


An Unfortunate Reconciliation

by TelepathJeneral



Category: Homestuck, Homestuck Intermission - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Other, Stabdads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-21
Updated: 2013-06-23
Packaged: 2017-12-15 16:38:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 19,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/851685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TelepathJeneral/pseuds/TelepathJeneral
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Crew's finally settled down-they do have children to contend with, after all. However, when old rivalries and dangers threaten their domesticity once more, it's a whirlwind of relationships and threats that finally let them go home in peace. It's not easy being a kid, and growing up, but these children can agree-it's ten times harder when your dad used to be part of a gang.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Droog tried his best not to let the other man touch him, leaning to one side as his ox-like companion greeted him.  
“Well, Diamonds, never would’ve expected you to show up here! Look at you, still all prim and proper-where’s that girl of yours, I wanna meet her!”   
“Boxcars-“  
“Go on, call me Hearts.”  
“Hearts, I wouldn’t point her out even if I wanted you to meet her. She’s under enough strain as it is.”  
“What do you mean?”  
Droog rolled his eyes, gesturing to the crowd of students. “Just look. She’s alone out there, milling around with hundreds of other kids-your interference would hardly be beneficial to her standing.”  
“Is little Diamonds worried about his widdle girl? I’ve never seen you gush so much as when you-“  
“Shut up.”  
Boxcars chuckled, clapping Droog with a heavy hand on the shoulder before nodding. “My Tavros is in there too, if you look-there he is, in the chair.”  
“He’s gotten tall. At least, for someone who remains seated.”  
“Yeah, well, I try. He’s still not, eh-“  
“Still a wimp, then.” Droog nodded knowingly, folding his arms. “Figures.”  
“Hey, it’s not his fault she-“  
“Don’t stick up for him, he’s a wimp! A pansy-assed child.”  
“Excuse me, gentlemen.” A smooth, sultry voice drifted through the space between them, making both men turn to stare as a tall woman strode toward them. “If you would let us through…”  
Droog resisted the urge to hop back as the woman and her charges barged through, both girls grinning cheekily at the taller men. The taller one, Vriska, nearly stomped on Droog’s foot, but he managed to slide the leather away in time. Finally, the girls drifted toward the crowd of other children, letting their companion return to her vehicle.  
“She’s going here?” Boxcars questioned in a confused tone. “My boy won’t stand for it, he won’t-“  
“He’s not standing for much as it is, Hearts.” Droog avoided a mean glare with a grin, folding his arms again to watch the other parents drop off their children. “Don’t tell me Clubs is bringing-“  
“Of course he is. He wouldn’t dare make a move outside our little circle. There, the taller one near the middle.” Boxcars nodded. “Aradia’s almost taller than him, would you look at that? She grew up fast.”  
“Insists on doing her own shopping now, too.” Droog nodded, but was distracted by the squeal of tires against pavement as a small black car pulled up to the sidewalk, a tall man in a ragged suit ushering a shorter teen towards the school. Mumbled curses could be heard even at this distance, and the boy finally shoved his escort away with a shout.  
Despite the disruption, the students managed to find their way inside the school building with little difficulty, leaving the courtyard bare within a few minutes. Droog and Boxcars stared for a moment at their now silent surroundings, waiting until the disheveled man pulled away again before speaking.  
“That was-“  
“Of course it was. We’d know him a mile off.”  
“He’s never been much of a team player.”  
“Why do you think we haven’t heard from him in a year? Who knows that his boy’s been through-“  
“Hey. Spades’ a good father. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” Boxcars protested, turning to go. “And I’m sure that boy of his is right as rain.”  
“I’m sure he can handle himself. It’s the other two, Snowman’s two-“  
“We’re not talkin’ about them.”  
“We have to, Hearts, your Tavros almost-“  
“I know! Your meddling didn’t help, though.”  
Droog rolled his eyes, moving to follow the other man back to the parking lot. “As if. I barely did anything, but Snowman has to come in and challenge us with those two? You have to realize that most of the problems Tavros had were her doing.”  
“The girl’s pure evil, but we can’t let Snowman take all the blame. Besides, the other one turned out all right.”  
“Little Terezi? I never spent much time with her.”  
“That crazy bitch of a mother kept her inside all the time. Said she was ‘fragile’.”  
“You didn’t notice?” Droog raised an eyebrow, catching up with the taller man.  
“Notice what?”  
“The glasses. She was wearing dark glasses.”  
“What, those? I just assumed those were for the sun, or something.”  
“No, you moron, she’s blind! Or at least visually impaired. It’s a wonder she’s even going to public school at all.”  
“Oh.” Boxcars quieted, shrugging. “Hey, uh-do you think we might have embarrassed them, seein’ them off like that? I mean, it is their first year of high school-“  
“They’ll get over it. Besides, I already discussed it with Aradia. She understood my concerns.”  
“Well, look at that, a Droog managing a normal relationship. I bet you two sit up and have lovely father-daughter talks, too.”  
Droog grimaced, finding his keys in his suit pocket. “Don’t be ridiculous. She’d ignore the suggestion if I ever made it. I let her have her freedoms, and she doesn’t get into trouble.”  
“Sure, sure…” Boxcars watched him for a moment, letting him find the car, then raised his hand in farewell. “See you when we have the time. Hey, will you be coming to the club anytime soon?”  
“Don’t remind me. I’ll get around to it.” Droog completed the obligatory wave, finally able to see Boxcars walk off, and settled into his seat with a sigh. Finally, the kid was off to high school.   
Why did he have the feeling that that really didn’t make things any better?


	2. Chapter 2

“Hey, Diamonds, nice to see you at last!” Eternally cheerful and never unkind, Clubs Deuce maneuvered his way through the produce section as he spotted his former acquaintance. “Did you hear, our kids are at school now! Together, I mean-“

“Yes, Clubs, I know.” Droog resisted the urge to massage a temple, and instead forced a smile onto his expression as the shorter man practically bobbed before him. “My Aradia, your Sollux-I went through all this with Hearts.”

“Oh.” Only momentarily crestfallen, Deuce nodded. “Speaking of which, I saw him at the club lately. We wondered where you went.”

“I have a life, Clubs, I don’t spend every moment at that stupid-“

“It’s not stupid!”

“If it’s not, then why hasn’t Spades shown up in nine months?”

Deuce was caught off guard by the query, left behind as Droog examined another section of fruit. “He’s just being stubborn, he’ll come around! He’s been busy, I’m sure, what with his store and his medical bills and-“

“Speaking of which, what have you been doing with all your spare time? Sollux doesn’t need you to hold his hand anymore-do you work?”

“Um, yeah, I help out Boxcars sometimes when he gets work…I went back to school.” The shorter man admitted shamefully, staring at the basket in his hands. “Just some entry level chemistry and stuff, see if I can get a degree in…something.”

“Did you ask Sollux?”

“Yeah, he helped me find the-hey!”

Droog grinned at the slight glimpse into the Deuce household-he could see it now, the lanky Sollux groaning as Clubs tried to operate their feeble computer. Ignoring Deuce’s glare, he moved on to begin examining the bakery section.

“This is so weird.”

“What is?”

“You, and me, like old times-you know, before the kids.”

“We never hung out in grocery stores ‘before the kids’.”

“I know, which is why it’s weird!” Deuce smiled, copying Droog as he chose a loaf of bread. “We always hung around liquor stores and gun shops.”

“And the park. Don’t forget the park.”

“Right, where Hearts got Spades that horse hitcher-good times, good times! This is what I’m saying, Diamonds, you should stop by the club. It’s doing well, and maybe if you came back, Spades’d show up.”

Droog hesitated at the other man’s tone, glancing at him to see the characteristic grin suddenly gone.

“And then there’s Snowman, what with her always disturbing things-“

“I’ll come.”

“What?”

“I said-“ With a wince, Droog nodded. “I’ll come. Aradia doesn’t like it when I disappear at nights, but she’ll understand. She can take care of herself.”

“Great! Yeah, it’ll be fun, I’ll make sure they have the Swedish Fish and that one dancer you always liked so much-“

“Be quiet.”

“I’ll save our old seats, and Hearts can-“

“I said, be quiet.”

“I need to tell Hearts, he’ll want to know too!”

“Shut up!” Droog whirled to glare at him, finally relaxing with a chuckle. “You need to slow down, Clubs, you’ll die young.”

“What?”

“I’ll invite my tailor. Maybe we can liven it up a bit.” Droog turned to go, leaving Deuce among the donuts and cake mixes. Without the other man watching him, he allowed himself a smile, considering their old haunting spot.

Maybe he should pick up something for Aradia, just in case.


	3. Chapter 3

It was a few months after school had started, the trees had begun turning, and the wind grew sharper, when Droog was persuaded to come down to the school, finding Aradia with some difficulty on the far side of the campus. She was quiet, which wasn’t too unusual, but even his few queries got no response, and it was when they had gotten into the car that he finally began prying.

“What happened?”

“Nothing happened, Dad. Everything’s fine.”

“If you insist.”

He pulled away from the lot, noting the few landmarks nearby, then nodded. “Aradia, please.”

“Begging doesn’t work.”

“I’m not begging.”

“Why does it matter? Why do you want to know?”

“Because I like knowing what you go through. I’ve told you about my time in high school numerous times-you could at least repay the favor.”

She sighed, shrugging. “You know Vriska goes to our school, right-Vriska Scourge?”

“Wait, who’s the ‘our’ there?”

“Me, Tavros, and Sollux. I haven’t seen them in a while, but they’re in my class, so…”

“Right, right, go on.”

“She got sent to the hospital today.”

“What?” Droog nearly braked in surprise, but managed to mask the tension with a small cough. “How’d she end up there?”

“See, this is why I wasn’t going to tell you. You’d just get worried.”

“Aradia-“

“Does it matter why she went? I won’t be copying her, so it’s not an issue.”

“You know I worry anyway.”

Aradia quieted, folding her hands. “I-Yes, I knew. Know. Continue to know.”

Droog nodded in affirmation, waiting another moment before speaking again. “You didn’t have anything to do with the Scourge girl, did you?”

“Well, I….now don’t take this the wrong way, but-she went to our old school too, remember? Me and Tavros and Sollux, and she tormented us all the time.”

“I was there, Aradia, I remember full well.”

“She was horrible! That bitch-“

“Aradia, language.”

She fumed for a moment, but sighed. “Anyway, I…well, Terezi and I-“

“Wait, Terezi? Her sister?”

“Adopted sister. They’re not close. Not since middle school.”

Droog whistled lowly, slowly untangling the confusing webs of teenage drama in his head. “When she did the whole…”

“Yeah, the Tavros thing. Anyway, I finally paid her back for that.”

“Listen, Aradia, if you did anything illegal-“

“It wasn’t illegal! Terezi made sure, we collaborated and I got Tavros to distract her. We weren’t sure about Sollux, because of what she did to him, but in the end we got what we needed.”

“What did you do?”

“I’m telling you, she did it to herself.”

“Did it involve firearms?”

“Dad!” She protested, glaring at him. “This isn’t your high school. I just used my fists. And strategically placed concrete blocks.”

“Ah. Of course. Because that’s so much better.” He rolled his eyes, pulling into their driveway to park the car. “Listen, Aradia-“

“And I don’t need the lecture from you about it, because I knew what I was doing. She deserved it. I won’t do it again.”

“I wasn’t going to lecture you.” He exited the car carefully, following her into the house. “I was going to say that I’m impressed.”

“Impressed?” She hesitated, facing him as she set her bag aside. “You-wait, why?”

“You said, she deserved it. And no one knows that more than I do. You know I know her mother-“

“I know, I know, she was a jerk in high school too, blah blah blah.”

“And it’s hard to forget what she did to Tavros. Hm.” He paused, putting a hand to his chin. “I forgot Sollux was there.”

“Yeah, well-it’s not a big deal. He apologized.”

“Wait, so you’ll take an apology from him, but you send her to the hospital?”

“He was only after me because she told him to do it! It’s not a big deal, Dad-“

“Wait-this isn’t because he’s a boy, is it?” He stepped forward, eyes narrowed. “That’s it, you like him, and beating him up would rather take the edge off the candy you give him later.”

“Don’t be ridiculous! I don’t like him!”

“You never hung out with him before this year, what’s so special about him anyway?”

“His dad knows you, I figured it would be okay!”

“We know Miss Scourge, too, and that relationship never panned out.”

“Just-stop!” She shook her head in annoyance, yanking at her backpack to head up the stairs. “The school doesn’t know, by the way. About me.”

“And Vriska? You managed to conceal it? That’s my girl.”

“Tavros won’t tell.” She disappeared from sight, her door closing with a muffled thud, leaving Droog to consider the situation with mixed annoyance and admiration.

“Well then. Wonder if Hearts knows.”


	4. Chapter 4

Aradia nodded as Sollux spoke, watching the street as the cars zoomed by. Her books were pressed tight to her chest, and Sollux wasn’t sure whether to sit or to stand-his ride wasn’t coming for a long while.

“So, I just wanted to say, you’re pretty good at stuff when you put your mind to it.”

“Thank you.”

“And you’re a lot braver than me.”

“What? Sollux, don’t be ridiculous, you’re brave. Not that you have the chance to prove it, but-you stand up for Tavros all the time.”

“No I don’t. Only when I can be clever about it. You’re strong, and smart. I’m just smart.”

“But you have your talents, Sollux, don’t put yourself down. You’re a nice guy, and you’re-wait, sorry, I have to go.” Dashing forward, Aradia flagged down the car that was pulling forward, ducking into the passenger seat to have her father nod.

“That’s Deuce’s boy, then.”

“Yep. Sollux waited with me.”

“I hope it wasn’t too long.” He replied stiffly, finding the exit.

“No, we just talked.” Aradia furrowed her brow, glancing over at her escort. “You don’t like him very much, do you.”

“Let’s say it’s strained.”

“You’ve told me about Mr. Deuce before, though-you and he are friends, right?”

“Aquaintances.”

“You were in the Crew together, though!”

“Aradia, what have I told you about going through my books?”

“Not to.” She folded her arms, sighing. “I just don’t see why I can’t hang out with him. He’s an okay guy.”

“And he hasn’t once made any perverted jokes, teased you, annoyed you, or hit on you?”

“Dad, he’s-okay, there was one time, but that was with Karkat.”

Droog’s grip on the wheel tightened, his knuckles paling. “Karkat Slick.”

“Yes. They’re good friends.”

“And the four of you just make a happy little gang, don’t you.”

“Dad!”

“I’m just-Aradia, that’s three boys, and one of you.”

“Are you serious thinking of that? Dad, you know them, they’re decent guys. They won’t do anything weird-and they’re all part of your stupid gang, anyway. I know Mr. Boxcars, he’s the closest thing I have to an uncle. It’s not complicated. You’ve told me the story, you all settled down and got jobs and-then Deuce had a kid, and Mr. Slick ended up with Karkat, and…” She quieted, thinking.

“And what, Aradia? What’s the problem?”

“Why did you choose me? I know Mr. Deuce and Mr. Slick had no choice, but you and Mr. Boxcars…you got to adopt. And you knew he was getting a boy, so why-why’d you wait so long to look for me, and why did you pick…a girl?”

Droog quieted, concentrating on the road. “Why does it matter?”

“It matters because you made it an issue. If you won’t even trust your own daughter with your friends’ kids, why would you choose a daughter in the first place?”

“I…Listen, Aradia, it wasn’t easy to find you. Unlike Deuce and Slick, we knew what we were getting into. I was younger, and I wanted to take my time. And I…well, none of the boys appealed to me. Sollux was already walking, and babbling, and destroying everything in sight, and Karkat was utter hell whenever I saw him.”

“Language.”

“My apologies. I didn’t want a kid that would eat me out of house and home before I could even make it a home. I wanted someone with a little…class. A little refinement. And that’s exactly what I got.”

“But I still destroyed stuff. And beat up kids.”

“Only because I taught you to. See, I’m not against destruction in the casual sense. I’m acquainted with Clubs Deuce, after all. I only wanted to be able to channel your destruction, guide it.”

“Turn me into the perfect little wrecking machine, hm?” Despite the question, Aradia smiled faintly, getting out of the car as they parked.

“Something like that, yes. And you turned out rather well, I think.” Droog mirrored her smile, moving to walk beside her before kissing the top of her head.

“That’s all well and good, but-Sollux doesn’t destroy stuff anymore. He’s nothing like his father.”

“Aradia…”

“If you won’t let me have the friends I choose, Dad, then what can I have?”

“It’s-“ He sighed, opening the door to let her inside. “Fine. I won’t object to you being with him. But he’s not coming here. Not until I can talk to Mr. Deuce.”

“Thank you.” Setting her bag down, Aradia approached him to quickly kiss him on the cheek. “I’ll make dinner tonight, if you want.”

“No bribes, Aradia, I know what I’m getting into.” Reluctantly smiling as she dashed up the stairs, Droog shook his head.

“Deuce’s kid…I suppose it could be worse.”


	5. Chapter 5

Droog shivered as he paced the stark white halls, looking over the room numbers as he searched for his destination. He hated hospitals. The liking of them had been bred out of him by Slick himself. But here he was, looking for the girl his child had beaten to a pulp.

Let no one say Droog didn’t take pride in his work.

At last, he located the room, ducking inside to find himself surrounded by shadow. Adjusting to the lower light, he drew close to the bed, nodding in approval at the numerous bruises already blooming on the girl’s face.

“Jerk.” She moved slightly to stare up at him, hampered by her sheets. “You told her to do that.”

“I didn’t tell her to do anything, Vriska. I simply gave her the resources and determination needed.”

“She’s a sick bitch, did you know that? I’ve heard about you, all of you, and your demented little kids. Aradia’s just the tip of the iceberg.”

At that, Droog had to chuckle, folding his hands behind his back. “Now that, I’d have to contradict. Sollux turned out relatively normal. And if you hadn’t dug your claws into Tavros, he’d be just fine. Weak, perhaps, unable to follow through, but still an okay kid. Karkat can’t be blamed for his father’s misdeeds.”

“They cornered me, her and him! Tavros set me up, he just sat there and watched while she-you don’t get it, do you?”

“I get it. It’s just a shame I couldn’t be there.”

“Diamonds.” The door opened to admit another occupant, the taller woman striding to the bed before stroking Vriska’s cheek. “Get out of this room.”

“Or what, Snowman, you’ll blind me like you did Slick? They have cameras, you know.”

“Perhaps we should install them at the school.” She narrowed her gaze, standing straight. “You, or any one of those bastards come near my children again, and you’ll have more to worry about than Slick’s pride.”

“You realize you don’t exactly scare me. Your hired goons can be outwitted.”

“Or paid off. Don’t think I don’t know about your visits to your ‘tailor’. He tells me.”

“Risky business, Snowman. Dangerous.”

“I know all about dangerous. I’m the queen of it.” Vriska piped up from the bed, trying to sit up. “I can take them, Mom, I’ll be fine. You don’t have to get your friends involved.”

“Hush now, sweetie, I’ll leave them out of it.” Smiling poisonously, Snowman nodded to Droog again. “Now, get out.”

“As the lady asks.” He touched the brim of his hat as he departed, tucking both hands in his pockets as he left. Once outside the room, he couldn’t resist a small grin at Snowman’s discomfort. She was rattled-Slick would be pleased. However, her promise of vendetta did worry him.

He’d tell Aradia to keep a closer lookout on Terezi.


	6. Chapter 6

Droog didn’t take much notice of the several people milling about-it was a bank, there were customers, it tended to be noisy. He had adjusted easily, although he could do without the interruptions. Every so often, his phone would ring, and he answered it dutifully, but for the most part he was allowed to concentrate, and keep his neurotic tendencies slightly more in line.

Even if that stapler was off, he wasn’t going to fix it. It wasn’t his job.

Aw, damn it- He winced as he reached forward, about to nudge the stapler when a voice made him pause. “Ah, Diamonds Droog.”

“Snowman.”

“Please, I’ve matured. Call me Ms. Scourge.” Twirling her unused cigarette holder, she smiled slowly, holding it out. “I thought I’d stop by.”

“Such pleasantries are unlike you.” Nevertheless, he pulled the pack from his suit pocket, gently placing the cigarette in her proffered receptacle. “Still-“

“Anything for the lady? I thought so.” Running a dark finger along his desk, she moved more fully into his square of an office, nodding in approval. “You’ve come far, Diamonds-much farther than Spades and his horrendous little shop.”

“He manages, I suppose. And the child seems happy.”

“Oh, that’s right! Little Karkat, all grown up. Tell me, do the boys ever get rowdy with your Aradia?” Chuckling at his dark look, she playfully batted him atop the head, making him fume further. “It was a joke, Diamonds, lighten up! I knew bankers were stiff, but god, you’re one uppity son of a bitch.” She grinned again, removing her finger from the desk to turn and lean against it. He stared at her dolefully, refusing to budge an inch, and finally she reached forward to place her nail against his chin.

“You taught that little jackal well, Diamonds. It’s always good to have a full arsenal.”

“Aradia has nothing to do with the business between us. Between you and Slick.”

“God, I should hope not.” She paused, shuddering before being able to focus again. “I would so hate to get them involved, but-needs must, yes? I’ve never seen any of you as the paternal type, but perhaps things have changed.”

“Things are over, Snowman, we have no need to do this.”

“Then tell me why you’re afraid.” She leaned close, lips nearly touching his, before ducking forward to whisper in his ear. “Tell Spades this is his warning. I won’t be so direct the next time I decide to contact him.”

Droog visibly tensed against his seat, knuckles whitening against the armrests, but she pulled away soon enough to disappear from his office. Shaking his head, Droog could still smell the scent of her perfume hanging around him, and forced her from his mind as he returned to work.

Her threats, unfortunately, had more lasting power than her perfume did.


	7. Chapter 7

That night, Aradia had prepared dinner for the both of them, setting up the table as her father arrived with a slam. She glanced up in some consternation, considering his haggard expression and the scent of smoke that hung around him, but ignored it to begin serving out their portions. After a few moments, he returned slightly more dignified, face scrubbed clean of dirt and grime.

“Ah. Thank you. I didn’t mention that this morning, did I.” Statement, not a question. Aradia dignified it with a nod.

“I didn’t know you would be working late.”

“You could have gone to bed, if you wanted.”

“It’s hardly even nine o’clock.”

“Please. I know you don’t go to sleep. I simply meant-“ He sighed, waving away the discussion. “Never mind what I meant. Thank you.”

She wisely kept the discourse to a minimum as they ate, letting him brood as he sliced the meat. When they were nearly finished, however, he glanced up suddenly, nearly surprising her as she paused.

“Aradia, what would you think if I…started dating again?”

Caught off guard, she nearly dropped her fork. “Again?”

“Yes, well-I dated before I found you.”

“Well, um…” To cover her confusion, she moved to take her plate to the sink, mulling over the question. Her father, dating? Obviously something had happened to prompt this, but she couldn’t just come out and ask-that would be ridiculous. “You don’t need my permission.”

“No, but I wouldn’t want to surprise you. And I’d let you meet her, of course, whenever you felt comfortable.”

“Oh. Thank you.” She was touched by the gesture, letting the dish soak in the soapy water. “Still, it’s not up to me. You can do what you want.”

“It wouldn’t be strange?” He moved to follow her, taking up his position in front of the sink as he rolled up his sleeves.

“Of course it would. But…I’d be okay with it. I mean, it must get lonely with only me.”

“Oh-no, Aradia, I didn’t mean to imply-“

“Dad-no, it’s fine. I’m not offended. But you should get out more.”

“I have the club…” Droog was surprised to find himself chastised, bowing his head in remorse.

“You don’t go all that often. You don’t like them-at least, not Mr. Slick. It would be nice if you got to hang out with some…woman….who complemented you and made you feel good. I’m just a kid. You need a-a-damn it!” She grabbed a dish as he handed it to her, drying it roughly. “Someone who’s your equal! Your intellectual equal.”

“I don’t know, Aradia, you’re pretty good. What do you say, you and me, that little Italian place in midtown?”

“Dad!” She complained, elbowing him roughly as she set the dishes aside. “That’s just downright creepy.”

“What, you’re a pretty girl! Maybe I just want to keep you away from all those little heartbreakers at school.”

“You know it makes you sound about fifty years older when you use words like ‘heartbreakers’. If I had a grandmother, that’s what she’d say.”

“Fine, fine, but look: I’m not thinking about it because of anything you’ve done. I’m not going to replace you or let someone ‘take me’ from you.”

“I know that…” She shrugged, turning to face him. He nodded, placing a hand on her shoulder, then pushed past.

“Good. Now-you better not have finished the Swedish Fish.”


	8. Chapter 8

Aradia shifted in her seat as the teacher droned on, tracing out the diameter of a circle for the thousandth time. And, for the thousandth time, very few students were actually paying attention. Vriska had returned to school, but the bruise still healing above her eye stopped her from calling attention to herself, leaving only Terezi as a possible annoyance. Aradia didn’t think much of it, however-Terezi was cool, and understood her little preoccupation with death. She had even stood up for Sollux and Tavros, once or twice. She was just an easy-going, friendly girl.

However, she did happen to be a little too friendly with a few people. Take, for example, Karkat Slick. He said he didn’t mind her annoyances, but her obsession with him was clear-she hung around him every chance she could get. He tried to brush her off whenever Sollux and Aradia were around, but Aradia still felt betrayed. Karkat was their friend, not hers, and it was unfair of her to steal him.

Then began her intervention with Sollux and…

No. She wasn’t going to think about it. Sollux had been her friend for much longer, and no uppity Scourge girl was going to get him again. Besides, he was friends with Karkat, and Karkat hated her. At least, he said he did. They usually tended to leave him alone whenever he began rambling about Terezi.

Aradia wished she had been able to spend more time with Karkat-she had gone over to Tavros’s house so much more when they were little, and Sollux knew the both of them pretty well. Their dads were all friends, right? So why did they leave the Slicks out so often?

Maybe it was less their problem than her problem. Her father made no secret of his feelings toward Spades Slick. As a result, she had been left out of Karkat’s life much more than the others, and he of hers. It wasn’t so big a loss, but now that Terezi had begun to wheedle her way into his life, Aradia was for once well and truly afraid.

She didn’t mention anything amiss when she got home, disappearing into her room to work on homework, but her father noticed her silence when he came to get her for dinner. After a few questions, he let her be, but she stared down at her plate of spaghetti for a long moment before she blurted out, “Terezi’s becoming friends with Karkat.”

“Terezi Scourge? I-Oh.” She noticed him tense, spooning the sauce over his plate. “And that’s a problem?”

“I’m not an idiot. I know you don’t like the Scourges, I don’t like them either. But she’s…she’s blind, and harmless, and I shouldn’t be jealous of the fact that Sollux and Karkat like her better than me.”

“They don’t like her better, Aradia.”

“Is that just dad talk or is that honest knowledge?”

Droog sighed, setting down his fork, and shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t know enough about Terezi. But, knowing her mother, I’d warn you to be cautious.”

“Yeah, tell that to Karkat.” Aradia pushed at her noodles, feeling a familiar resentment bubble up inside her. “Why didn’t you ever let me see him, either?”

“Karkat Slick? I didn’t approve-“

“Of his father, right. But you were in the Crew together, so why all the hatred?”

“I don’t…hate the man, it’s just a bit strained between us. With Boxcars and Deuce, it’s a little better for everyone.”

“If you say so.”

“I do say so. Now eat your spaghetti.”

She quieted in obedience, careful not to slurp as she enjoyed the meal. However, the next time someone spoke, she was surprised to find it wasn’t her.

“So, ah-Aradia-do you think Terezi might have…romantic intentions for that Karkat boy?”

She nearly choked on her noodle, but carefully swallowed it to nod half-heartedly. “Probably. She likes him, for sure, but she knows not to get her hopes up. Why?”

“Oh, no reason, no reason-I simply….” Droog furrowed his brow in concentration, wincing. “And does Karkat curse much?”

“Are you kidding, he’s famous for it. People go to him just to learn new insults.”

“Wonderful.” Droog rolled his eyes in emphasized sarcasm, sitting up to finish eating.

“Is that why you don’t like Mr. Slick so much? Because you never let me swear, and he does?”

“Aradia, it’s not as simple as that. I’m simply of the opinion that the need to swear indicates a lack of the ability to properly channel and postpone anger.”

“This, coming from the man who broke our kitchen window when-“

“Aradia.”

“Sorry. But that’s simply not true, Dad, Karkat’s a smart guy. And he’s not perpetually angry.”

“Oh?”

“Well…okay, maybe he is. But he’s a decent person.”

“’Decent’ implies the ability to sit in a room full of children and not do or say anything untoward. Neither Karkat nor Spades display that ability. Swearing is a lack of self-control, and that I abhor.”

“So you’d shove away a good friend just because of his mouth? You’re all adults, there’s no need to keep things PG. I just-“ She sighed, making Droog pause to study her.

“Yes?”

“I don’t get it. Maybe you should….never mind, you wouldn’t listen anyway. But you haven’t actually talked to Mr. Slick in ages. Maybe he’s different.”

“I doubt it.” He stood to begin clearing the table, letting her follow. “But…I suppose it couldn’t hurt.”

Aradia allowed herself a small smile, handing him the dishes to wash. “You know, you’re supposed to be the one giving me relationship advice, not the other way around.”

“Oh, of course-say, Aradia, how are things with that Sollux boy?”

“Dad.” She rolled her eyes, moving around him before waiting to dry the dishes. “We’re not even dating, we’re just friends.”

“That’s what they all say, until you stay over at his house.”

“I haven’t-we’re not even-you’re the one who said all discourse should be suitable for children!”

“You caught me. But-“ He paused, looking to her as he handed her a plate. “You know I don’t mind if you…develop feelings for him. Just be careful, okay?”

“Okay.” She nodded, relaxing in relief. “Still-I think it’s a better warning for Karkat than me.”


	9. Chapter 9

It was dark when Droog finally entered the rundown building, removing his hat to hand it to the attendant standing inside the door. He could already see Boxcars and Deuce from his vantage point, and after a moment the shorter man stood to greet him. Fortunately, neither of them called his name, and he was able to make it to their circle of chairs in relative silence.

“Boxcars.”

“Droog.”

“Diamonds!” Clubs Deuce eagerly shook his hand, leading him to a seat before nudging a bowl of Swedish Fish towards him. “I told you I’d get it, didn’t I?”

“You remembered. I’m impressed.” Droog raised an eyebrow in silent query to Boxcars, who replied with a shrug and a nod. Taking two fish, Droog settled back into his chair, glancing at the ceiling. “Spades isn’t here.”

“We didn’t expect him to be-why, did’ja need something?” Boxcars shifted in his couch-like chair, folding his hands to lean forward.

“No, no-well, perhaps. I wanted to talk to him.”

“What? You, talk to Spades? I thought you-“

“Hated the guy, yes, I’ve been told.” Droog sighed, sitting forward to emulate Boxcars, and took a small handful of fish. “I simply…it’s strange, having just the three of us. We don’t even have that much to talk about anymore.”

“Besides him.” Boxcars pointed out, taking a small packet from his pocket. “Or your outfit. Do you have to wear those duds every day, or was tonight a special occasion?”

“He’s always been a suave sort of gent, a real gentleman!” Deuce agreed, glancing over the pristine suit. “Wish I could pull it off.”

“You did, in high school. The dance? You put some poor girl through a night of stooping and staring just to have a date.”

“Hey! She liked me, even if I was short. Besides-“ Deuce eyed the other two. “I was the only one that got laid that night.”

Both Droog and Boxcars began to protest, rising to each other’s defense, but were interrupted by the calm voice of an attendant. “This gentleman claims to be a member of your party, sirs-“ To their surprise, Spades Slick stood before them, his wide-brimmed hat in his hands.

Droog was the first to recover, nodding with an easy “He’s no gentleman, but he’s welcome.”

“Glad to see you back, Spades.” Boxcars greeted with a grunt, rummaging in his pockets again. “Damn it, I don’t have any Scotty Dogs-“

“Don’t bother, I’ve got my own at home.” Spades waved him off, not meeting any of their curious glances. Deuce awkwardly offered him the bowl of Swedish Fish, a move which made both Slick and Droog wince, before settling into a chair far too big for him. Slick sat across from Boxcars, completing the circle, and waited for someone to speak.

“So, um…what were you talking about before I got here?” He questioned slowly, glancing around at the other three. They, in turn, glanced at each other quickly, unofficially electing Droog as their spokesman.

“Well, we were…discussing-“

“Reminicing.”

“We sound like old ladies.” Deuce laughed nervously, unable to dispel the strange air that had settled over them. His chuckles made all of them shift self-consciously, and finally Slick cleared his throat.

“Listen, I know it’s been a while. And that’s my fuckin’ fault.”

“Slick-“

“Let me finish. It’s been almost a year since we were all here at once.”

“You’ve come here without us?”

“I said-“ Slick tensed, but sighed. “I just wanted to say that-you all did good. With your kids, I mean. I didn’t actually mean for us to end up here, gathered around a table like a bunch of old farts with children. Karkat was an accident.”

“Sollux was too.” Deuce piped up, shying away at the glares of his companions. “Just…wanted to point out…”

“Yes, well-I know I’m not perfect, but I managed. And Karkat tells me about your three, so I just wanted to say that I’m impressed. You did it.”

Droog eyed him warily, afraid to move, and finally raised an eyebrow. “Are you drunk?”

“What the fuck? Why would you-“

“Because you usually are, Slick-“

“It’s Spades.”

“And this is unlike you.”

“Nah, it’s not.” Boxcars shook his head, squaring his massive shoulders. “He did this in school. And afterwards.”

“I had forgotten about that.” Droog mused for a moment, relishing Slick’s annoyance. “I-Well, I guess I’m sorry for avoiding you, then.”

“You’ve been avoiding me?”

“You’re apologizing to him?”

“We’re out of Swedish Fish?”

Droog tried not to sigh, simply closing his eyes as he let the other three babble. Finally, he sat up, reaching into his suitjacket to remove a cigarette. “Listen, I’ve been avoiding all of you. Aradia was starting high school, and I wanted to give her space.”

“She doesn’t run your life, daddy.” Slick avoided the glare with a slow smile, nodding at the cigarette. “Didn’t even give those up for her?”

“I’m still Diamonds Droog, peabrain.”

“Now he’s daddy Diamonds Droog.”

“Okay, just because my name happens to begin with ‘D’-“

“C’mon, Diamonds, it’s just a little teasing.” Boxcars grinned, turning to order from the attendant that approached. “Besides, we all have kids, we know how it is.”

“Well, you don’t all-“ Droog tensed, sitting back.

“Don’t all what?” Slick tilted his head in curiosity, fingering the hem of his shirt.

“You simply have…it’s different.” Droog quieted, considering the lit end of his cigarette before shrugging. “You have Sollux, and Tavros, and Karkat. I have Aradia.”

“Come off it, Aradia’s tougher than Sollux and Tavros put together. I, uh, don’t know about Karkat.” Boxcars glanced to Slick, who waved a hand non-commitally.

“He’s all right. But what’s your point, Diamonds?”

Rolling his eyes, he eyed the three of them dolefully. “She’s fourteen.” When that got no response, he collapsed back into the chair. “You honestly don’t see it?”

“Uh, considering we only get to see her about two minutes out of our day-“

“If we’re lucky!”

“Then no, we don’t see it.”

“I don’t know whether to be relieved or insulted.” Droog extended one hand, keeping the cigarette between his thumb and forefinger. “On one hand, well, you have Tavros and Sollux, who are somewhat behind on their maturation as comical young men. On the other hand, you have Aradia, who’s already two inches taller than Sollux and refuses to let me take her shopping. Am I making this any clearer?”

Slick stared at Droog’s hand, eventually bursting out in a rough laugh. “Are you complaining because she’s a girl? Come on, Diamonds, it can’t be that bad. At least the two of you don’t get into shouting matches.”

“Only because he won’t let anything get above twenty decibels.” Boxcars chuckled, accepting the drink offered by the attendant. “And she’s brave, too, she stood up to the Scourge girl.”

“That’s right, Diamonds, you should be proud!”

“Wait, the Scourge girl?” Slick suddenly sat up, at attention. “Which one?”

“Vriska. There’s no record of it, but she was out of school for a few days.” Droog absentmindedly accepted the bowl of Swedish Fish again, nodding thoughtfully. “Speaking of Scourge, Slick, I need to see you about something.”

“I said, it’s Spades when we’re here, but-“ Slick nodded, leaning closer. “I never said, it is good to be back.”

“It’s good to have you back. I’d forgotten how…cathartic this was.”

“Enough with the five-dollar works, Diamonds, and out with it. What about the Scourges?”

“Well, we run into Snowman at times, at school and such-“

“Crazy bitch.”

“That may be, but a few days ago, she stopped by the bank.”

“What?” Droog was surprised to see actual alarm register on Slick’s face, gears beginning to turn. “What did she want?”

“There were some vague threats. Took a dig at your pride, the usual. She also said it would be the last direct warning by which she would contact you. I’m guessing she assumed we spoke more often.”

“Yeah, well-and she’s got the two girls to our four….”

“Boys and girl? I didn’t think it would be an issue, especially after Aradia took care of Vriska.”

“But the other one’s still in commission.”

“She’s blind.”

“Don’t underestimate someone because of a handicap.” For reference, Slick gestured to the bright white scar that crossed his forehead to end just below his eye, the raised skin visible even in the light of the club. “And there’s…been talk.”

“With whom?”

“Karkat.” With that, Slick sat back again, sinking into the cushions of the chair. Droog studied him for a moment, then mimicked his motions, letting the sound of the atmosphere and the gentle scent of the smoke relax him.

“You know, Spades, apparently Karkat’s been getting friendly with someone else in class. Did you know?” Deuce piped up, glancing at the other two in consternation. “Sollux didn’t tell me much, but-“

“I knew. And he doesn’t need you tattling on him like a shitfaced child.” Slick replied irritably, waving him off. “Stupid childhood drama.”

“Tavros never mentioned anything.”

“Tavros made out with that stupid Scourge girl in fifth grade, this is par for him.” Slick rolled his eyes, finally sitting up. “I know what Karkat’s been up to. But I can’t do anything. I threatened him, bullied him, even sat him down for a ‘talk’ and everything, but-he likes her.”

“He hates her!” Droog protested, recalling Aradia’s annoyance. “He can’t stand her!”

“Now, that he learned from me. You remember, ah, Redd? After we-you-graduated, we went out for a while-“

“You have problems, Spades.” Boxcars confessed, staring at him. “And you passed ‘em on to your kid.”

“Well, it’s difficult. So he’s probably obsessed with her by this point. And, like the fuckface I am, I let him do it.”

“But they haven’t-I mean, there isn’t any…” Droog waved a hand vaguely, thinking. “They’re not together.”

“Not yet. But he’d probably stand up for her.”

“And if we were ever in a situation-or if Snowman ever made a move, and brought Terezi along, then-“ Droog nodded firmly. “We’re fucked.”

“It’s gotta be serious if Droog’s swearing.” Boxcars agreed. “I admit, Tavros’s problems were partly my fault, but even so, he wouldn’t go after Vriska. We’re compromised.”

“Well, there’s no guarantee that we’re going to be threatened.” Droog pointed out, standing to put out his cigarette. “Don’t lose sleep over it. Go home, tuck your little boys in, and don’t worry unless Snowman makes a move.”

“Diamonds is right.” Slick agreed, waving a hand toward him. “Just lay low, and we’ll be fine. You…goin’ home?”

“I should. Aradia will get impatient.”

“You’re whipped and you don’t even have a girlfriend. You do have all the luck.”

“Shut up, Boxcars.” He turned, taking his coat, and made his way out to inhale the fresh night air. Slick knew more than he did-which was fitting, considering he was the head of the operation. Droog winced internally, finding his car in the lot with some difficulty.

Since when had this become an operation?


	10. Chapter 10

Droog nodded to the attendant behind the counter, handing his coat to the man as he waited. The attendant himself was tall and sickly looking, fiddling with his coat pockets as he disappeared into the back. Soon enough, a shorter, thicker man strode out, greeting Droog with a tight-lipped smile.

“Mr. Droog. Good to see you again.”

“It’s nothing much, Stitch, just an adjustment to the sleeves.”

“They are a pain, aren’t they? You need to come by more often.”

“So everyone says.” Droog sighed as he was taken into the back room, setting his hat on the coatrack before nodding. “We won’t need the step, correct?”

“You got it, Mr. Droog. Just put the thing on.” Stitch nodded as Droog shrugged on the coat again, rolling his shoulders before holding his arms out straight.

It was quiet as Stitch began his work, his large hands surprisingly proficient at the use of a stick of chalk. Droog resisted the urge to hum, and instead studied his surroundings for any indication of Stitch’s various hobbies.

It was no secret that Stitch had worked for the Felt-as part of a gang under Snowman, he had been paid well. However, when they dissolved, he turned his attentions more towards stitching cloth rather than skin, and Droog had found no tailor with a finer seam. Their mutual agreement worked out well: Stitch didn’t alert Snowman to anything potentially incriminating he might find in Droog’s pockets, and Droog decided not to let Deuce torch the little shop.

Die’s involvement worried him, but Droog figured he had little to fear from the man. His greatest talent was the ability to get underfoot. Letting Stitch turn over his arm, Droog nodded once. “Have you been busy?”

“Eh, here and there. People don’t appreciate craftsmanship like they used to.”

“I noticed you replaced your clerk.”

“Itchy never took the orders correctly. You, I attend to myself, but other customers…well, it’s not a big deal. Die’s simply better.”

“You all stay in contact, then.” Droog spoke in a monotone, trying not to react as he spotted a cue stick hidden behind a rack of other coats, the tip covered with a blotch of brilliant green felt.

“’Course we do, you knew that. What’s the matter? You seem a little jumpy.” Stitch glanced up at his companion, holding a pin in his mouth.

“Nothing, nothing-a pin stuck me, that’s all.”

“Right.” Stitch nodded, returning to his work, and Droog concentrated on the cue stick in an effort to recall the Felt code. It was obviously a message, but it wasn’t Snowman’s usual calling card. And Itchy’s replacement was worrisome-he was one of the more competent members of the Felt. Stitch wouldn’t just drop him without a second thought.

Had Snowman summoned the squirrely fellow? Perhaps the cue stick was a signal to meet up, a clever way of saying “get the ball rolling”. Of course Stitch had to talk to the rest of the Felt; after all, Droog still spoke to the Midnight Crew. But a large gathering was unlike them, which indicated it was Snowman’s doing.

“Does Snowman ever stop by? I know she likes the high end of fashion, and there’s her daughters-“

“Never seen the kids. She doesn’t like my little outfit.” Stitch grunted, pinning the sleeve with a smile. “’Outfit’. That’s funny.”

“You’ve never met Vriska? Or Terezi? They grow like weeds, she must have brought them in.”

“What Miss Snowman does is none of my business, and it shouldn’t be any of yours. I leave well enough alone.”

“But what if she had a reunion-for old times’ sake? Would you go?” Droog raised an eyebrow, watching the other man as he considered the question.

“Maybe.”

“It’d be just like it was back then, the roughhousing and fights, and all your talents put to good use….”

Stitch began to smile faintly, eyes growing cloudy as he stared into the distance. Suddenly, he shook his head, tugging at Droog’s other sleeve to begin pinning it. “Nah. Not my taste, any longer.”

“Really? And Die’s neither?”

“Well, there’s no accounting for that guy, I mean-when he got the summons, his eyes lit up all-oh fudge.”

Droog yanked his hand away quickly, reaching to his belt for the knife he kept there. “So you were contacted.”

“It didn’t mean anythin’, I swear-“

“’Just a reunion?’ What does she want, what does she have planned?”

“I don’t know! She wouldn’t tell me anything, I’m a nobody! I just sew them back up when you’re done beating the tar out of them.”

“Well, you got something right.” Droog relaxed, considering his companion. “Keep your nose clean, and things won’t get ugly.”

“I’m ugly enough as it is, I don’t need any help.” Stitch gestured to the scar across his cheek, then nodded to Droog’s coat. “You need me to, ah-“

“I’d rather not.” Droog turned quickly to exit, startling Die at the front desk. With a rapid motion, the tall man tucked something beneath his desk, watching Droog with wide eyes as he exited the shop, pins still in his coat.

Once out of sight of the storefront, Droog grimaced and pulled out the pins in his sleeves, letting them clatter to the pavement before finding his car again. With a grim nod, he made up his mind, realizing his only course of action. Slick had to know.


	11. Chapter 11

As Droog pulled into the driveway, a small splash of color near the door caught his eye. Neither he nor Aradia were much for decorations, and the bright green seemed drastically out of place among their doormat and entryway. After parking and exiting the car, Doog let his lip curl in distaste as he made out the doll lying on the threshold, and reached to pick it up before moving inside. “Aradia, was this here when you got home?”

“What, the doll? Yeah, it was-I dunno , I thought it was different. Is it important.”

Droog raised both eyebrows, hefting the brilliant green plush in his hand. “You could say so, yes. Do you still wear that stupid Aries charm sometimes?”

“Yes-just last week. Why?” She poked her head out from the door of the kitchen, watching him in curiosity.

“No reason.” Quickly hiding the doll in his pocket, Droog set down his briefcase, letting his body move on autopilot as he fingered the two pins stuck into the felt-like fabric. One, very obviously, was the shape of a diamond, but the other he now recognized as the curl of the sign of Aries.

The cheating Felt bastards.

++++++++

Aradia woke early-far too early for ‘normal’ days-and sat up in her bed to listen to the sounds of the house settling around her. A clink of glass made her tense, going on the alert, before making her way to the stairs and slowly creeping down.

The kitchen light offended her still-sleepy eyes, and she winced as she adjusted before being able to make out her father standing above the counter. Before him, several bottles of clear liquid were splayed out, and he touched each one in rhythm before quickly rearranging them. She signed in annoyance, then stepped forward to come into the light.

“Dad, it’s 3 am, go back to bed.”

“Everything’s fine, Aradia, just go back to sleep.”

“You’re rearranging your vodka again, not everything’s fine. Come on, let me take care of that-“

“No. Go on.” He pointed resolutely to the stairs, never once looking at her.

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re disobeying me, Aradia.”

“I don’t care.” She stomped forward to fold her arms, mimicking his stern glare. “You are coming with me, or I won’t go.”

“Aradia, you’re-“ He finally glanced up, narrowing his eyes. “You’re not a child.”

“Exactly. So I deserve to know what’s going on.”

“I-“

“Dad, please, anything.”

“I…I can’t. I’m sorry, it’s better if you don’t know.” He straightened, touching one of the bottle lids again, then nodded. “Look, maybe this wasn’t the best time for discussion-“

“C’mon. Sleep.” She placed her hand above his carefully, raising an eyebrow. Droog hesitated, but carefully took her hand, motioning to the bottles.

“But the vodka-“

“Leave it. You can do it in the morning.”

“Aradia-“

“You always pull the ‘dad’ move on me, now I pull the ‘daughter’ move on you. Bed.”

“Can I complain?”

“Only a little.” She managed to tug him from the kitchen, leading him back up the stairs. “You get violent when you’re tired.”

“Hey, you do too.”

“Raised by the best.” She grinned as she shoved him toward his room, ducking into her own. “Good night!”

She listened for the muffled reply, then nodded in approval, returning to her own bed to fall back asleep. Even so, it wasn’t as easy as she had hoped. If her father was shaken enough to still be awake at 3 am, then things weren’t all right in the state of Denmark.

The idea this time was that they’d stop Hamlet from dying.


	12. Chapter 12

“The bitch is crazy.” Slick nearly slammed the door in Droog’s face, hesitant to let him in. “She doesn’t want anything from us.”

“Don’t ask me why she’s doing it, need I remind you of the incident that June-“

“She already drained us of everything we had, except from you, and she made it in the big leagues! Why on earth would she bother with us?”

“Dad?” Karkat appeared from a hall, glancing at Droog suspiciously. “I know you. You’re Aradia’s dad.”

“Yes, yes, Karkat, Droog, Droog, Karkat.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Karkat.” Droog made a small bow, doffing his hat to the boy. Slick rolled his eyes at the formality, but Droog saw no reason to forgo basic pleasantries for time’s sake.

“Why are you here?”

Droog hesitated, surprised at the boy’s similarity to his caretaker, but shrugged. “There’s been some trouble with an old friend.”

“Ms. Scourge? Please, don’t remind me. Her daughter’s given me enough hell.” Karkat waved them both off, moving into the kitchen.

“Come off it, Karkat, he knows!” Slick called, relishing the middle finger that appeared from behind a wall. “The kid’s adorable, really-“

“Cut it out. We need to stick to the subject.”

“Listen, if the Felt isn’t too heavy on it, we can take her. We keep Deuce in line, tie down the kids, and we’re good!”

“That’s-that’s what’s different. We have four extra bodies to do something with.”

“And so what? So they stay home, so they-“ Slick paled, glancing back at the kitchen. “You don’t think they’d come here, when they’re alone?”

“If we hole up in the club, we wouldn’t know.”

“And that little blind one’s already got her nails into Karkat-“

“You know how Tavros is, especially with Vriska-“

“With all the Felt, she could do any number on us, and then-“

“We’re goners.” Droog nodded quickly, ducking his head as Karkat reappeared.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing, kid, nothing. Just talking about you.”

“Why does everyone insist on doing that? I’m a big boy, Dad, I don’t need you to protect me any more.”

“But Karkat, what about-“ Droog stopped himself in time, taking a step back.

“About what?” The teen narrowed his eyes, glaring at the supposed stranger. “You guys honestly think that we can’t handle stuff just because we’re fourteen?”

“No, kid, he wasn’t saying that-“ Slick moved between the two, grimacing. “Head on back to your room.”

“Hell no! I want him to know that we’re as strong as any one of you, especially Sollux’s dad. Okay, so you’ve been back to that stupid club or whatever. So you’re all great pals again. But you can’t just exclude us because, hello, we’re your fucking kids!” Finished with his rant, Karkat stormed off again, disappearing with a slam.

Droog glanced from the hall to Slick once or twice, reaching for his waist to find his radio. “Later, I suppose.”

“Yeah, yeah, later. Tell Deuce and Boxcars to check in, I’ll come up with something.” Slick waved him off, letting the door close. Droog released a held breath, thinking momentarily, then set off to return to his own abode. If the Felt were truly going to face them again, he’d need to dig up some old friends from high school.


	13. Chapter 13

Aradia shifted as Droog hesitated, adjusting his tie before reaching forward to knock at the door.

“Dad?”

“Not now, Aradia.”

“Are you nervous?” She grinned as the attendant opened the thick door, looking at her quickly before ushering them in. “I mean, I am underage and all-“

“It’s fine, you’re with me. The staff knows.” He didn’t look at her as he steered her into the lobby, glancing around before spotting the rest of the Crew. Aradia hummed faintly as he pushed her forward, retaining her smile as Droog placed a hand on her shoulder to nod.

“Gentlemen.”

“Diamonds.” Boxcars nodded to him, but Slick simply smiled widely, making Karkat groan.

“Sollux, Tavros-oh, look, a bug smear.” Aradia offered, staring pointedly at Karkat.

“Hey, Aradia.”

“You take that back this instant-“

“Sit down, boy.” Slick took a hold of Karkat’s shoulder to shove him back into the couch, nodding to Droog. “She’s, ah, a nice girl-“

“I’m right here, you know.”

“You are taller than Sollux, aren’t you.” Boxcars acknowledged, answered with a nod. Deuce put his hand to his chin for a long moment, staring at her, until finally Droog stepped forward.

“What is it, Clubs?”

“I dunno, I guess I just…I expected more pink?”

As if on cue, Sollux and Karkat burst out in laughter, Deuce scrambling to quiet them. When Sollux recovered, he removed his glasses to wipe at his eyes.

“Aradia, in pink? Dad, where have you been all this time?”

“Well, I just thought-“

“It’s Aradia, the one who beat up Vriska only a few months after school started. Where did pink factor in?”

“The bloodstains, Sollux, you forget.” Her quiet voice stilled the two of them, impressing Slick. “Besides, pink isn’t a disclaimer to being strong, or brave, or whatever you people seem to think I am.”

“That’s my girl.” Droog clapped his hand on her shoulder, gesturing to a chair beside the two of them. She sat as he gestured, folding her hands in her lap with an implacable calm.

“So, ah…why did you need us here, again?” Tavros hesitantly ventured, wheeling himself forward to glance at Aradia. “I mean…we’re not in trouble, right?”

“Not trouble, per say, boy, but-“ Boxcars looked to Slick, who shrugged.

“Well, as it turns out, you all know about our time in the Midnight Crew, yeah?”

“Don’t sugar coat it, Dad, it was a gang.”

“We weren’t gangsters.” Droog held up a hand. “We were mobsters.”

“Like that’s one hell of a difference!”

“Karkat, sit your ass down and shut up. The four of you have happened to make the acquaintance of Vriska and Terezi Scourge, rather drastically in the case of young Tavros.” Slick gestured to the teen, making him wince. “Considering neither Karkat or me were there, how about a little summary for the two of us?”

“Well-“ Aradia glanced at her father, who nodded for her to continue. “Vriska had been tormenting Tavros for some time, as part of a role playing game we had-Vriska and Tavros went out to do battle, while Terezi and myself imagined the world they were in. Terezi was…quieter, back then. Also-“

“Not blind.” Sollux pointed out. “Sorry, AA, go on.”

“They ended up in a tree together-“

“What, whoa, how old were you?” Slick protested, earning him glares from the other three members of the Crew. “I mean-never mind.”

“Since someone decided to go there, we were eight. All of us.”

“Vriska was nine…” Tavros volunteered, bolstered by his father. “Anyway, she kept teasing me, and finally she did this-this thing, and I couldn’t stop myself-I fell out of the tree, and apparently I twisted something and then I heard something crack and everything kind of went dark.”

“I got to see him in the hospital-I didn’t take Vriska all that seriously at first, but then-“ Karkat shrugged, gesturing to Aradia.

“It was a low blow, and underhanded. So I got back at her. It wasn’t much, just a little strategic manipulation, but she was terrified of the dark after about a week. She knew it was me, but she couldn’t do anything, so-“

“So she came to me.” Sollux nodded slowly, sighing. “She did that thing again, like with Tavros-I personally think it’s some kind of hypnosis, but it scares the hell out of me.”

“He managed to bully me back into place, and I hid from everyone for a while. Didn’t come out much, you know. Next time I saw Vriska, Terezi was blind and Vriska had her arm in a sling. I never asked what happened, and I’ve never really told the story….until now.” She nodded to Slick, straightening. “That’s our knowledge.”

“Now it’s your turn.” Karkat demanded, folding his arms. “C’mon, spill it. You have something with Snowman, and we want to know what.”

“We know you were part of the Crew, the four of you, and she took you down time and time again.” Sollux added. “And there’s something about the Felt, but we don’t know much about them.”

“Well, ah-you see, boys, it’s-aw hell.” Slick slumped in his chair, taking the shot glass from the table beside him. “Diamonds, you tell them.”

“Me?”

“That’s what I said, ain’t it? Chop chop.”

“Ah.” Droog nodded, sighing pensively before beginning. “Snowman leads her own gang, the Felt you mentioned. With fourteen of them, and four of us, you’d expect us to lose, but we held our own. Deuce-or Clubs-learned what he needed as an explosives expert, Hearts was very obviously our muscle-“ Here, Boxcars grinned sheepishly, shrugging as Tavros looked to him. “Spades was our thinker, our leader, and I…well, I-“

“You got the money?” Aradia interrupted, earning herself a mild glare. “I mean, you work at the bank , so I just figured-“

“The casinos got the money, kid, he invested it. Also, he was pretty handy with a sniper rifle.” Slick grinned as Droog set his jaw, carefully nodding.

“This was before I worked at the bank. Anyway-everyone had their guns, but I had the greatest experience. Also, there were times I suspected I was the only brains in the group.”

“Hey now, you just said-“

“Fin and Trace, Spades? You were nearly dead when we hauled you out of the Tiki-“

“Oh, right, never mind, go on.” Slick tried to hide his embarrassment behind another swig of whiskey, ignoring Karkat’s stare. “You were the brains.”

“Whenever something went wrong-and it often did-it usually fell to me to clean it up. I didn’t usually mind saving your sorry asses. Usually.” Droog shook his head, making Deuce cringe in remembrance. “In the long run, though, Snowman managed to steal or cheat us of most of our cash, leaving us broke until we made a final run for it. Just about then, we happen to find out that this guy-“ He gestured to Deuce. “Has a kid he didn’t want to tell us about. We figure, hey, cut our losses and get away from Snowman. Spades discovers his long-lost son-“

“You lost me?”

“You were two days old, your mom didn’t tell me which hospital she had gone to!”

“As I was saying-we all found actual jobs. I pitched in to build this place, Spades managed to pick up enough capital to open a gun store, and that’s how it’s been ever since.”

“It goes without saying that we were adopted somewhere in there.” Aradia jumped in, shying away as her father glanced at her.

“Yeah, I mean, about that-what on earth possessed you to adopt us?” Tavros questioned, glancing between Droog and Boxcars. A quiet moment passed, and finally someone spoke.

“Well, actually-“

“I was the one who thought of it-“

“The process alone took about two years-“

“All the ins and outs, the foster homes and paperwork-“

“It was hell!”

“And then finally we had kids-“

“And they’re always really careful with single guys-“

“But they let us have you-“

“And then we did it and we were happy and-“

Droog paused as the attention of everyone in his party suddenly focused on him, and he was forced to recall his last line of conversation before wincing internally.

“It’s…a long story.”

“You wanted to fit in.” Slick said in monotone, swirling his whiskey. “God damn it, you wanted to fit in with the rest of us!”

“Now, that’s not true.”

“Look at you, trying to fit the status quo-“

“Hearts did it too, he took in Tavros!”

“Right, and you got precious little Aradia. Guys not exciting enough for you?”

Droog stared at the other man, finally reaching down to tap Aradia’s shoulder. “We’re going.”

“Finally.” She moved to stand, about to follow him, but a voice made her pause.

“Just a second-you two need to stay.” Sollux sat up, silently pleading with Aradia. “We still don’t know about the Felt.”

Droog hesitated, raising an eyebrow. “If you can get the other one here to shut the hell up-“

“That’s my job, not his. Dad-“ Karkat broke in, about to stand. Slick groaned, but shoved him back again.

“Fine. I won’t tease him about Aradia.” Slick motioned vaguely for her to sit again, grumbling.

“And?”

“And what?”

“He’s implying that there’s an apology necessary.” Aradia replied curtly, folding her legs to stare at him.

“Shit-“

“Spades, for the love of all that is good and proper, would you just man up and apologize-“

“For your overbearing, sexist, and frankly demeaning attitude towards me, and the utter lack of respect-“

“Aradia, that’s enough. We all know poor little Spades has enough trouble handling Karkat without having to deal with your tongue.” Droog nodded, watching her relax again. “Well, Spades, what’ll it be? You asked for her here, now deal with it.”

Slick grumbled momentarily, but sighed. “Sorry. Damn if you didn’t turn her into a little mini you, Diamonds, she’s got more edge than my knife!”

“I’m supposed to take that as a complement, right, Dad?” Aradia’s eyes never left Slick, making him shift in his chair.

“He means it as one. Might as well take it, it’s the best you’ll get.”

With a collective sigh of relief, Sollux, Karkat, and Tavros relaxed.

“Now: the Felt.”


	14. Chapter 14

“Tell me again.”

“Dad-“

“Again, Tavros!”

“O-Okay, there’s Itchy, and Doze, and Crowbar, and Quarters-“

“Trace, Die, Fin, Stitch, Snowman, Cans, Matchsticks, Eggs, Biscuits, and…”

“It’s Clover, dumbasses, Clover!” Karkat finally shouted, tossing aside another wad of paper. “Why did Aradia get to leave and we all have to stay here?”

“Droog convinced your father that there was a need for further apology. Besides, she’s got a good head on her shoulders. She already knows all this stuff.” Boxcars gestured to the paper, which contained the biographies of the Felt members.

“Her dad probably told her, you mean-“

“Shut it, KK, we wouldn’t be in this mess if you hadn’t gone and made out with Terezi-“

“Shut up! I did not, first of all, and second of all it doesn’t matter! We’re preparing for whatever Snowman throws at us, I get that, but why does it still feel like I’m back at school!”

“I don’t know, m-maybe because we’re…actually learning something?” Tavros suggested, shrugging from across the coffee table. “I think the information is nice, actually, if we ever got cornered-“

“And that’s the other thing! Why would Snowman come after us? If her plan was to steal me away via Terezi, which is still a stupid plan, then why does she even need us? Why does she want us?”

“Don’t ask me the questions, kid, ask her!” Boxcars stood indignantly, tossing the papers down on the table. “I’m going to find Clubs, god knows he could babysit you all for a spell.”

As the door to the apartment slammed, Tavros chuckled nervously, shrugging as the other two teens looked to him. “Well, it’s just like old times, huh? Back before school started?”

“Give it up, Tavros.” Sollux mumbled, picking up the papers again. “Now, let’s think this through-some of these guys are idiots, and some aren’t half bad, so…”


	15. Chapter 15

“Sheesh, what is their problem?” Sollux made a face as Aradia led him away from the school building, watching as Karkat and Terezi disappeared behind a building. “It’s obvious she can’t keep her hands off him, but he has to go and encourage it?”

“Have you ever considered that he might reciprocate her feelings?” Aradia questioned, leading him to a curb before walking along it. “It wouldn’t be so strange.”

“Would be for him! You don’t know him like I do, AA, he hated her guts. Especially with the whole Vriska mess.”

“Is it…because of what I did?”

“No. I don’t think so. He’s pretty cool about you.”

Aradia smiled, releasing Sollux to turn and face him. “What about you? Are you cool with me?”

“What? Of course I am, you’re smart and funny-“

“That’s all?” Despite her tone, Aradia leaned forward with a smile. “Sure there isn’t anything else?”

Sollux hesitated, blinking behind his glasses as he quickly processed. “You know, AA, that’s the shittiest pick up line I’ve heard.”

“I wasn’t trying to pick you up, I was trying to confirm that I already had you!” She protested in some annoyance, folding her arms. Sollux rolled his eyes, but stepped forward, reaching up to take her arms.

“Fine. You have me, then.”

“You promise?”

“For as long as I can manage it. I like you, Aradia, and it has nothing to do with the fact that we spent practically all our time together growing up. You’re awesome.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say awesome, but I’ll let you have it.” She tensed in surprise as he stood on tiptoes, gently touching his lips to hers before pulling away.

“Can I have that, too, just for good measure?” Sollux ducked with a grin as she dropped her backpack, advancing with menace.

“Why, you-Sollux, look out!” Grabbing his arm, she pulled him back as a car whipped into the school parking lot, coming to a stop to let Spades Slick tumble out. “Mr. Slick?”

“What? Oh, Aradia, thank God-where’s Karkat?”

“Karkat? I, um-“ She backed away as he drew closer, his foul mood not placing her in a very advantageous position. “Sollux?”

“He’s with Terezi.” Sollux replied nonchalantly, earning himself a nudge from Aradia. However, the damage was done, and Slick took out his anger on his already worn hat.

“That bitch-you know what, fuck it, never mind, he can do what he wants. What are the two of you doing out here, anyway?”

Sollux glanced to Aradia in desperation, but for a man so slow, Slick was surprisingly quick with the connection. “Oh, don’t tell me. This is perfect, fuckin’ perfect. The one order I give the Crew, the most important thing I tell them, and you kids go on and have stupid make out sessions anyway! Do you have any idea of the shit that’s coming-“

“Dad, lay off.” Karkat emerged from around a corner, trying to arrange his mussed hair. “I know how you feel about the romance stuff, but they don’t.”

“KK, thank God! A little reference, please?”

Karkat waved Sollux off, hefting his backpack over one shoulder as he scowled up at his father. “I was with Terezi. I didn’t hear you call.”

“Right, I figured-so the one thing you know I disapprove of, you run off and go do?”

“You disapprove of a lot of things-“

“That’s not the point! I told you not to go chasing skirts until you were out of school, especially not skirts that have a mother who wants to kill me!”

“I wasn’t doing anything with her! I was telling her to back off!”

Slick stared down at Karkat in some surprise, the rest of his prepared punishment dying on his lips. “You what?”

“Sollux, help me out-Terezi’s been on my case for weeks, I just never told you about it.”

“Wait, wait, wait, Terezi Scourge has been personally paying you special attention?”

“Yeah-Sollux?” Karkat glanced to him meaningfully, urging him with a scowl.

“What? Oh, right-he’s right, Mr. Slick, Aradia and I were just talking about it. Terezi’s been pretty into him for a while now. And she doesn’t try to hide it.”

Slick paused to think for a moment, finally shaking his head in annoyance and beckoning to Karkat. “Forget it, just get in the car. I have to pick up a shipment from a new supplier by today, and if I’m not there-“

“He means the gun store, right, KK?” Sollux questioned, watching as Karkat reluctantly followed his father back to the car.

“Of course he does! If he was running drugs, he wouldn’t take me along.” Karkat ended the conversation with a shrug, turning to say something to his father as they both entered their rusty jalopy. Aradia watched serenely as they left, then glanced back at Sollux.

“Apparently Mr. Slick has something against teenage romance.”

“What, your dad’s never explained that?”

“Never.”

“Speaking of which…would he like to know that I might end up monopolizing your time after school?”

“Oh, please, you won’t-“ Aradia fell quiet suddenly, reaching to pick up her backpack. “I’ll talk to him about it.”

“Wait, don’t you think that’s something I should-“

“Not now, Sollux!” Taking off into a run, she waved, stopping at the parking lot again as her father’s car pulled up. “Sorry, I just have to-hi, Dad.”

“Aradia. Sollux.” Droog touched the brim of his hat as Aradia climbed into the front seat, nodding to Sollux. The teen winced slightly at the thought of the conversation waiting for him, but waved as they left, grateful to not have to join them.

Adjusting her backpack in the front seat, Aradia didn’t say anything for a long moment, waiting for her father to speak before replying. Finally, Droog sighed softly, leaning into his seat. “What were you doing with Sollux?”

“Just…talking.”

“Don’t lie to me, Aradia, it’s very unbecoming.”

“I didn’t lie. We did talk.”

“Your ‘talks’ are beginning to worry me.”

“Why, because I’m alone with a guy for once in my life?” She bit back, regretting too late the tone she had adopted.

“Aradia, that’s not it, and you know it.”

“It’s because it’s Sollux, isn’t it-you don’t approve of him? Why, Dad, why? He was fine when we were little, even when we were in middle school, but now-“

“Do you forget so easily, Aradia? He was the one who hurt you, he came to you and destroyed what you held dear.”

“That wasn’t him, though, he only did it because of Vriska!”

“That doesn’t change the fact that I had to watch as you cried, hurting and broken, because he had betrayed your trust.” Droog quieted, keeping his eyes on the road. “He hurt you once, Aradia. I don’t want to see you hurt again.”

“Dad…” Unused to such sentimentality from her father, Aradia shrugged half-heartedly. “I’m not a fool. I can handle this.”

“Have you made anything ‘official’ yet?”

“What? Dad, no! Why would you assume-“ She hesitated, flushing a dark red as Droog glanced to her in confusion. “That wasn’t a euphemism?”

“Aradia, please have a little faith. He hasn’t been over to our house for three years, and I know for a fact that you’ve been home every night except one since school started. That’s what I like about you.”

“Well, you kind of have to like me. I am your daughter.”

“You know what I mean. It…well. Never mind.”

Aradia nodded in understanding, moving to lean against the door. “I should have told you earlier.”

“What, that you liked him? Perhaps. But I understand-after all, I am your father. It’s not as if you could just…tell me something like that.”

“No offense, or anything, but-it’s just a little awkward.”

“I’m not making it any easier, am I.”

Aradia had to smile at his wry tone, and nodded. “Like I said, we haven’t done that much. Just talked. He hasn’t really even asked me out.”

“Let’s hope we won’t have to deal with that hurdle for a while, yes?”

“Hm. Let’s not.”


	16. Chapter 16

Slick groaned as he stared at the mess that was supposed to be his kitchen, rifling through a stack of newpapers before discarding the bunch. After the disastrous shipment, and forcing Karkat to pay attention as he finished the transaction, he figured he could try to cook something for the kid, and he had.

Tried, at least. Anything beyond a Hot Pocket was a bit beyond his skills, but he had located some noodles in the pantry, and figured those were pretty easy. Just some water and a pot, right? However, the pot was proving meddlesome, and he wasn’t aided in any way by his own thoughts.

Terezi Scourge had begun showing an interest in his son. Nothing too drastic. However, he had to keep in mind that Terezi was Snowman’s daughter, and thus most likely had some ulterior motive. Old passions aside, Snowman still wanted to hurt him-and with Karkat, they had a big target. As much as he wouldn’t admit it, he liked the kid, and technically…he did love him. The boy might be an asshole second only to his father, but they shared a lot together. The Hot Pockets, the shouting matches, the late-night tv shows when neither of them could sleep.

Slick forced himself to admit that he’d be lonely without Karkat: more than that, he’d be devastated. Hence, if Snowman ever tried to pull something on the kid, she’d be taking Slick down with him. It was brilliant, really, but the moves were too subtle for Slick to be sure. Was Terezi simply smitten? Or was she acting under orders from her mother? Either way, it upset Karkat, and that earned him macaroni.

“Damn it, where is that pot!”


	17. Chapter 17

Karkat winced as he was pulled along the sidewalk, a clunky briefcase clutched in his free hand while his father mumbled into a handheld radio. He tried to pull away, but Slick didn’t let up, and he was finally jerked into the lobby of the now-familiar club, released to clutch at the briefcase. With a rude gesture to the attendants, the two of them were left alone, and Slick finally sighed in relief as Karkat managed to open the case.

“Diamonds and Clubs are on their way. Hearts will try to keep a look out for a while longer.”

“And Tavros?”

“Shit, I forgot-“

“Never mind, it’s not important anyway. I guess these are weapons?” Karkat stood over the briefcase, examining the five compartments within. “And you dragged that stupid chest over here days ago-“

“That’s just for backup, boy. This, here, is the real thing.” With a grin, Slick knelt to begin unloading the case, nodding in approval. “Think you can handle my rapier wit?” Karkat tensed as he found a sword pointed at his neck, then scowled in annoyance.

“This isn’t time for fucking games, Dad!”

“A sword’s a sword, kid, take it or leave it.”

“You seriously fight with swords?” Karkat reluctantly took the blade, hefting it in one hand.

“It’s for defense, not actual attack.”

“So I’m not attacking.”

“Did I say you were? Leave the actual stabbing up to me, you handle yourself.”

Karkat quieted, letting the sword tip nudge the floor. “You’ve never even let me practice with your knife before.”

“Yeah, well, that was before I knew Snowman would try to pull this. Remember what I said, kid, don’t let that-“

“You’re worried.”

Slick stiffened, still focused on the case before him. “Now, there’s some other stuff you might be able to use-“

“Stop it. No one’s coming, we’re practically alone. There’s an extreme possibility that someone we know might die in the next 24 hours, and I know I don’t want it to be me. So just for once, Dad, would you fucking drop the act and look at me?”

Slick glanced up at him carefully, the scar over his eye whitening. “What do you want, boy?”

“I don’t even know anymore. I just want-“ Setting the sword aside, Karkat sat to face him. “To say thanks. You’ve basically made my life a living hell, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

“Kid-“

“I love you, Dad.”

Slick hesitated, then reached across the small space between them to pull Karkat to his chest. “I love you too, Karkat.”

“Yeah, great, sure, so-“ Suddenly embarrassed by the show of emotion, Karkat pulled away to stare at the case again. “What’s this Butterfly Effect knife again?”


	18. Chapter 18

“Dad, we don’t have time for this.”

“Just a pit stop, Aradia, nothing to worry about.” Pulling up to the curb, Droog got out of the car quickly to approach the storefront, knocking once. “Stay in the car.”

“I don’t get it, why are we here? This is the wrong side of town-“

“You remember Stitch, right? Tell me what he does.”

“He’s-oh, he’s the medic, makes the suits and stitches them up. Are you saying he’s here?”

“I hope he’s here.” When a worried face appeared at the door, Droog grinned, slamming the door roughly to elicit a pained groan. “Good news, Aradia. Get me a pike.”

“You just said-“

“Forget what I just said, get it!” Aradia quickly grabbed a weapon from the back to follow her father, handing it to him to watch him wedge it into the doorframe to pin the door shut.

“Hey, Diamonds-c’mon, you know I wouldn’t do anything, I’m harmless!”

“You’re staying in there, Stitch-oh, and is Die with you?”

“Uh….”

“Tell him the next time I find him outside my home, his next puppet’s going to resemble his own effigy.” Droog stepped back from the door to nod. “Now we can go.”

“We still have twelve left.”

“You think I don’t know that? We’ll be more fortified at the club.”

Aradia sighed, getting into the car again to buckle herself in. “We’ve got about twenty rooms, not including the lobby, and…”

++++++

“Dad, slow down!”

“No way, boy, this is too much fun!” Boxcars happily turned the corner with a sharp spin of the wheel, making the car’s tires squeal. “Who was the last guy we got, Matchsticks?”

“If you mean the one with the fire extinguisher, then yeah. Still alive, though-“

“Doesn’t matter, he’s out of the game! Next stop-Can Town!”

“But Can Town isn’t even a place…”

“It is when Cans is the size of one. C’mon, Tavros, this isn’t so hard! Have a little faith in your old man.”

Tavros winced as they sped along, gripping his handhold until his fingers turned white. “Can we please slow down?”

“Why should we-like this, it feels like flyin’!” Boxcars let out another triumphant whoop as they swerved along the back streets, his large frame hunched over the steering wheel. “Go on, boy, live in the moment a little!”

++++

“This is stupid.”

“C’mon, I thought you liked blue!” Deuce held up the hat carefully, nodding to Sollux as they continued along. “It’s a brilliant disguise!”

“I look nothing like Doze, even after you beat him black and blue. Won’t his friend want him back?”

“Eh, Itchy’s probably busy.” Deuce shrugged nonchalantly, beginning to whistle. “You got the C4?”

“Yes, I have it. For all the good it’ll do us.” Sollux rolled his eyes, hefting the backpack on his shoulders. “We could have at least gotten a red hat to match.”

“Nah, Crowbar and Trace aren’t around. I guess we could find Cans, or Matchsticks….”

“The ones twice your size? No thank you.”

“Well, then, hurry up, boy! We’ve got a club to save?” Beginning to run, Deuce beckoned him onward, making Sollux groan.

“Coming, dad!”


	19. Chapter 19

Slick peered through the eyehole of the door as he heard a knock, opening it quickly to admit the other three members of the Midnight Crew. Droog headed the pack, along with Aradia, and surprised Slick with a delighted smile. “Not bad.”

“Bloodstain on your shirt, there, Mr. Boxcars.” Sollux pointed out, stepping forward to relieve himself of the backpack. “Oh, Aradia, thank god.”

“Sollux! I mean-“ She hesitated as Droog glanced at her, then settled for a small wave. “Hello.”

“You met with trouble?” Slick questioned, leading them into the lobby. Unfortunately, a loud shout interrupted him, and Droog looked up to see Karkat barreling toward them with a crowbar held in both hands. “Fuck it, kid, it’s them! They made it.”

“What? Oh, oh, fuck, sorry. My mistake.” Karkat relaxed as he slowed, nodding. “You guys took forever.”

“We made a few pit stops.” Droog shrugged nonchalantly, his grin still plastered across his face. “Body count, gentlemen?”

“Cans and Matchsticks are incapacitated, Diamonds, and I saw Quarters-“

“Doze is out of commission!” Deuce piped up.

“Seriously, Clubs, trapping that guy is like punching a paralyzed monkey in the face!” Slick complained.

“But…I got his hat-“

“We helped take down Cans, for what it’s worth.” Sollux volunteered. “Also, there was some fat guy in a hat trying to follow us.”

“Sawbuck? Perfect, just what we need, another lardball getting in the way.” Slick removed his hat to pace momentarily, glancing out the window. “As you can see, Karkat and I found Crowbar lurking outside. Pretty stupid of him, actually.”

“And Quarters? We never confirmed Quarters-“

“Actually, Spades, we saw him too. Got him to chase us for a bit, then left him with the police. Aradia put on a good show.” Droog nodded. “We shouldn’t have to worry about him.”

“Great, great, so that leaves-“ A thud against the door made Slick pause, and he moved to glance outside before swearing. “Eggs.”

“Not Eggs. Never Eggs.” Boxcars paled, backing away. “Spades, we need a plan!”

“That’s not my department, that’s Diamonds! You, pretty boy, come up with something!”

Droog rolled his eyes, taking Sollux’s backpack to toss it into the next room. “Hearts, take Tavros upstairs. The Wrathtub and Battledrobe should be up there, take Sollux if you need to. Clubs, you keep a watch on the windows. If Sawbuck shows up, blow him away, and don’t let Itchy in. I’ll deal with Trace and Fin when they show up. Spades, you take Clover when he appears. Aradia, I want you to take Karkat-“

“Hell no!”

“You take Karkat and go to the roof. Alert us if anyone approaches, or something changes-if you must, engage them. Actually-we don’t really have armor your size, but we probably have a bulletproof vest in the Brawlsoleum. Slip it under your shirt, Karkat, you do the same. You’ll be vulnerable up there, so we’ll sacrifice speed for safety. Now, go on!”

“Um, Dad-“ Aradia hesitated, glancing around as Boxcars moved into action.

“What’s the matter, Aradia?”

“Nothing, nothing. I’m going.”

“That’s my girl.” Droog watched them go, then nodded to Slick. “Keep all your weapons on hand. I’ll try to convince Hearts to deal with Eggs.”

“You know Biscuits will join him.”

“That’s why we need Hearts.”

Slick nodded, then stuck his knife into his belt loop to pick up a Death Rattle. “Aradia’ll take care of Karkat, right?”

“What’s the matter, little Spades all worried about his precious baby boy?” Droog laughed at Slick’s death glare, moving past to follow Aradia to the Brawlsoleum. “Good luck.”

“Yeah, yeah-you too.”

“It’s good to be back, Spades.”

Slick hesitated, letting a small smile creep across his face. “It’s good to be here.”


	20. Chapter 20

“There’s no way we can hold them off!”

“They’ll make it in, no doubt about it….”

“Listen, you two, stop blubbering and help me sort out these things!” Boxcars complained, pulling out several axes.

“Hey, Mr. Boxcars, what’s this?” Sollux held up a flimsy magazine, several placards falling out from between the pages as Boxcars snatched it back.

“Nothing, kid, nothing, just leave it.”

“Hearts!” Droog called from the stairway as he entered, glancing at the strange trio. “Leave them, we need you to take care of something.”

“Oh, no, you’re not getting me out there-“

“You’re the only one who can take them. With Biscuits with him, we’ll need everything you have.”

Boxcars hesitated, then nodded quickly, taking two axes before glancing to Tavros. “See you later, kid. Don’t get yourself into trouble.”

“R-Right, okay-“ Tavros watched him disappear with a small wave, glancing to Droog after a moment. “Mr. Droog?”

“You two are going to stay up here. Currently, we’re looking out for Sawbuck-he may be huge, but he packs a mean wallop-and he’s their amnesiac specialist. If he gets his hands on you-“

“Last few hours, gone. We forget everything.” Sollux finished, grimacing as he dropped a weapon on the floor. “Is this a penis cane?”

Droog considered it for a moment, shrugging. “Probably. Strange, he still has it. Anyway, you both need to know that they’ll probably breach our weak security at some point. When that happens, you both have very important jobs. Tavros?”

“Y-Yes, sir?”

“Are you in any way opposed to falling down the stairs with that chair of yours?”

+++++

Slick watched from the window as Boxcars tried to deal with both Eggs and Biscuits, the two of them dancing jigs around the large man as he swung indiscriminately. He was tired of holding the Death Rattle at the ready, and turned to place it back in its case, when a small, cheerful voice interrupted him.

“My, my, quite unlucky, Mr. Spades!”

“Clover-“

“No need to be so formal! I will be going, after all!” Clover, who it was, dashed from the room as Slick tried to pursue, running into Droog as he burst out of the door.

“Damn it, Diamonds-“

“Watch yourself, Spades!” Droog shoved him away, dusting off his suit in some annoyance. “What is with you?”

“Clover, Clover’s inside! Get him before he makes it upstairs!”

“Damn it all-“ Droog swung his cue stick once, hefting it in his hand, and took off after the tiny menace, letting Slick raise the alarm over the radio. A large blast outside made him pause, and the shattering of glass brought him to a back room where Deuce lay unconscious. Outside, Sawbuck was in a similar state of awareness, Aradia and Karkat coughing in the smoke.

“What happened?”

“We took down Sawbuck, we think.” Karkat climbed in through the broken window, ignoring the shard of glass in his hand. “Apparently there was a bomb involved?”

“Did either of you touch him?”

“No, we were smart enough to avoid that. Quite a step, for Karkat.” Aradia nodded as she similarly entered, sighing in relief. “We saw Boxcars with the two out front-“

“And Dad raised the alarm for something, I couldn’t make it out.”

“No making out! I heard that, Karkat!” Slick appeared in the doorway, harried. “He came in here, I swear!”

“Who?”

“Clover.” Droog replied, eyeing a darker patch along the wall. “Spades, hold still-“

“I can’t hold still when that bastard’s running around underfoot!”

“No, I’m serious, hold still.” Droog raised his cuestick, making Aradia tense.

“Dad, what are you doing-“

“Would you all just shut up for a moment?” With a resounding crack, Droog landed the base of the cue stick on Fin’s skull, tossing the stick away in order to pull up a stout machine gun. The wall was quickly riddled with holes, and the body of Fin fell to the floor, twitching.

“Oh.” Karkat finally spoke, stepping forward. “Is he dead?”

“I doubt it. Broke my best cue stick, though.” Droog winced, tossing the mangled wood into a corner. “Ah, sorry about that, Aradia-“

“It’s not a big deal. But if Fin’s here, then-“

“Damn all of them.” Slick backed away to consider the hallway, sighing. “When Clubs wakes up, get him to help Hearts. I need to find Clover.”

“Why is she doing this, Droog-I mean, sir. Snowman herself hasn’t even shown her face, what’s she playing at?” Karkat asked, nudging Fin with his foot. “Do we have to get rid of all these guys first?”

“I suspect she wants us dead. It would fit.” Droog sighed, beckoning to the two of them. “Aradia, you stay with Clubs. Let him know what…well, you heard Spades. Karkat, you’re with me. Watch out for Trace, and let us know if Itchy shows up. I don’t know where he might be.”

“Roger that.” Aradia saluted mockingly, taking up a post beside Deuce. “Good luck.”

“You too, kid, you too.” Escorting Karkat out, Droog hurried to change his plan, accounting for Snowman’s absence. “Now Karkat, I’m going to need you to answer a few things, if you can….”


	21. Chapter 21

“She won’t be happy when she gets here, man!” Clover giggled, avoiding Slick’s swipe. “So unlucky, so, so unlucky-“

“Shut up, you twig-legged bastard!” Slick growled, rushing the smaller man again and again. “What’d you do with Itchy? And where the hell is Trace?”

“No one tells on Trace, no one cares about Trace-“ Clover laughed as a painting fell from the wall, dashing over to inspect it. “Sorry, old buddy!”

“If another one of you shows up I’ll get Clubs to blow this place sky-high, despite me being here.”

“Like breaking a thousand mirrors! Oh, no, you won’t want to do that!”

“What does she want?”

“Why don’t you ask her yourself, Spades Slick?” Clover ducked, backing away. “Her little girls are quite the treat, aren’t they, two horseshoes hung up over her fireplace-you shouldn’t be worrying about me.”

“Boss!” Boxcars appeared in the door way, panting. “We know Trace is in the lobby!”

“Deal with him, or better yet-Get Diamonds to deal with him, I’ve got this son of a bitch to take care of!”

“Oh, Spades, don’t you know-“ Boxcars tossed away his TV antenna, wadding up a roll of newspaper. “You don’t need a knife to catch him. He’s too lucky for that.”

“Now here’s a man who understands! Good for you, sweet cheeks, what-ah!” Clover suddenly found himself a few feet from the ground, his collar firmly in Boxcar’s meaty hand.

“You don’t have to be too unlucky to be smacked by a newspaper, though.” To emphasize his point, Boxcars drubbed Clover on the head with the paper. “Droog did this last time, actually. Dunno why he had a newspaper.”

“Oh, I know that one! He doesn’t actually read it, he uses it-“

“So you found him.” Droog nodded from the doorway, glaring at the little man. “Aradia, Clubs, and Karkat are reporting some disturbances. The doors are unlocking.”

“Damn that Trace bastard! Hearts, tie him up with whatever lucky thing there is, and get your ass to the door. She’ll be coming.”

Slick moved to follow Droog quickly, nodding as the other man began to explain Trace’s path. Boxcars watched them go, then grinned at Clover. The smaller man paled, then began to babble again.

“So, so unlucky, like-like a thousand black cats, Hearts Boxcars, doesn’t that scare you?”


	22. Chapter 22

“Remember, just think of him as Vriska. This is Vriska. You can take her.”

“I know, Dad, I’m fine, I’m good-“

“All right, if you say so. Get her.” Having isolated Trace at last, Droog allowed Aradia to dash forward, landing the first blow with a reinforced glove. “Have at him!”

Trace tried to complain, fleeing from the small room, but Droog’s senseless drubbing with a new cue stick forced him back. Before long, the skinny man fell unconscious, Aradia smiling faintly as she returned to her father.

“That was the strangest thing I’ve ever done.”

“Did he hit you?”

“Just once, on the shoulder. He’s pretty weak, though. Just a bruise.”

“We’ll take a look at it later. Spades’s been trying to follow Itchy.”

“So he finally showed up?” Aradia carefully removed her gloves before tucking them in the waistband of her skirt, following Droog.

“Yes, and I’ve got Clubs and Hearts running patrol. Sorry-Mr. Deuce and Mr. Boxcars.”

“I know who you mean, Dad. Where are the other three?”

“They’re upstairs. We think she may try to use Vriska and Terezi as weapons, so I’ve prepared them.”

“They’re…most likely here already, aren’t they.”

“Probably, yes. Trace let them in.”

“I suddenly feel a lot better about beating him up.”

“That’s it.” Droog grinned as he led her upstairs, facing the three boys with a nod. “Karkat. Do you have-“

“Dad got it for me. If you say it’ll work, it’ll work, but…it’s pretty old.” Karkat held out a 20’s style cigarette holder, letting Droog examine it.

“All of you, step back. Well, I guess Tavros can wheel back, but-go on.” Droog waved them off, gently sliding a finger along the shaft before turning it around. The pointed tip of the holder extended, the base widening suddenly to turn into a thick lance, and Droog nodded in approval as Karkat and Sollux stared. Tavros, however, was absolutely entranced, leaning forward in appreciation.

“It’s-It’s amazing, that’s amazing!”

“I’m glad you think so. You’ll be using it.”

“What?” Tavros paled, carefully handling the lance as Droog handed it to him.

“Be careful with it. Sollux, the instant you see movement down there, you need to shove him down the stairs.”

“What?” Tavros repeated.

“You’ll live, don’t worry. The momentum will turn your charge into a killing blow, should you hit someone, and Sollux will be right behind you with the Crook of Fealty. Don’t ask. Just move.” Taking the handles of Tavros’s wheelchair, Droog maneuvered him to the head of the stairs, directing Sollux to stand behind him. “Aradia, you take a break here with-where’d Karkat go?”

The three of them looked around in surprise, Aradia groaning faintly in annoyance.

“Well, never mind, you rest here. I’ll help the other three with Itchy and Snowman, and if Karkat shows up again, tie him up.” Droog eyed the three teens, nodding firmly. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

“Right you are, sir.” Sollux saluted as he hopped back down the stairs, the sounds of angered charges sounding from another room. “What did that mean, Aradia, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do?”

“Nothing, really. Then again, he’s not fourteen and female, so it’s hard for me to tell.” Moving beside him, she gently hugged him from behind, hiding her face against his shoulder blades. “We’re almost done, Sollux.”

“You know, guys, I-I’m here too.” Tavros piped up, making Sollux chuckle.

“And so now, we just wait.”

“Wait for the bitch to show up.”


	23. Chapter 23

Droog hesitated outside the old door, listening to the shouts from inside before convincing himself to enter. Apparently, Slick had finally found Itchy-escorting Snowman herself onto the premises. Though capable, both Boxcars and Deuce proved ineffective against the speedy gangster, and were thoroughly occupied with him while Slick faced Snowman herself.

In such circumstances, Droog was happy to help. So happy, in fact, that he didn’t notice the worrisome creak that resounded from the floorboards as he joined in the fray. Itchy instead took most of his attention, as did freeing Deuce from a trap of his own construction. Seriously, the little man was horrible at any kind of forward thinking.

At least he didn’t have to worry about Slick this way.

++++++

When a loud noise sounded from down the stairs, Tavros tensed, watching the faint light on the floorboards. “A-Are we ready?”

“Karkat still isn’t back.”

“Doesn’t matter, Sollux, are we ready?!” Tavros’s nerves were contagious, and Aradia forced herself to nod.

“Ready when you are, Tavros.”

“Okay, uh, well-now!” Tavros nodded as he braced the lance against his hip, relishing the well-practiced move he had often attempted at home. Sollux shoved him forward with as much energy as he could muster, wincing as the wheels clattered down the steps before charging forward with his Crook.

Aradia followed a few steps behind, borrowed cue stick at the ready as Sollux yelled. Tavros, propelled by his momentum, hadn’t managed to come into contact with anything, now forced to turn himself around and wheel back to the two of them as they stared at the empty hallway.

“She was here, I swear!” Tavros nodded, glancing up and down the hall. “There, that room over there-she was too fast!”

“Who, Tavros?” Aradia and Sollux rushed to follow him, ushering him into the next room.

“Vriska, of course! Can’t you smell her perfume?”

“You morons, bunch of crazy crippled kids!” Vriska suddenly revealed herself, spitting her hair from her mouth as she tried to arrange her disheveled clothing. “I could’ve taken you!”

“Well, then, do it now!” Sollux challenged, gripping Tavros’s chair. “Three to one, I like those odds.”

It’s just Vriska, I’ve beaten her once before, it’s only Vriska! Aradia shook herself into action, dashing forward with the cue stick as Tavros and Sollux followed with the lance.

“Hey, suckers, that’s my mom’s lance! How the hell did you-fuck!” Vriska stumbled back as Aradia’s swings made contact, her coordination off in the dim light. “You can’t beat me!”

“Who says we can’t?” Tavros challenged her again, Sollux struggling to pull out of their charges. “Why are you dodging, if you’re not afraid?”

“I’m not afraid of you losers. You were so pathetic, your own parents didn’t want you! They gave you up and let some old fogies take you in!”

“Liar!” Aradia surprised her with a particularly violent jab, twisting the stick to make Vriska yelp in surprise. “If that’s the case, then you’re no different! Your mom never gave birth to you.”

“Who’s to say she didn’t, idiot?” Vriska grinned suddenly, spinning away to find herself confronted with Tavros’s lance. Jaw set, Tavros stared at her, watching her tense as Aradia’s cue stick stuck into her back.

“Game over, Vriska. We won.”

“Like I would care! This is just the end of a story that’s been long in coming-I mean, after word gets around that Aradia Droog beat you up, there’s not much left of a social life for you. Not much of a life at all. Even Mom knew it, she said I was ‘unpredictable’. She concentrated on Terezi, then, for all the good it did-go ahead, then!” She shouted suddenly, surprising them. “Kill me, if that’s what you want!”

“Vriska, I…” Tavros hesitated, warring with himself as he held the lance to her chest.

And that’s when the ball dropped.


	24. Chapter 24

Now, by the expression “the ball dropped”, this author does not mean to indicate a literal ball dropping. However, they do mean to indicate something else dropping, which in this case, was the ceiling of the room the four teens found themselves in.

Rotten beams and floor panels crashed around them as the various members of the Midnight Crew suddenly fell to the ground, dust and rubble clouding everyone’s view. Aradia struggled to find her father as the air cleared, and lifted a small beam from his shoulder, concerned as he winced.

“Dad?”

“It’s nothing, just not as young as I used to be. I’ll be fine.”

“You bitch, you godforsaken daughter of a whore, I’ll kill you!” Slick shouted as he got to his feet again, swaying slightly. “What did you do?”

“You think I planned for this, Spades? You think I wanted to find my daughter with a lance at her throat, a failure?”

“Wimp.” Droog muttered, glancing at Tavros. “He wouldn’t have done it.”

“What the hell, Snowman-“ Slick stomped forward, yanking her from the rubble with a sneer. “It’s just you, now. So give it up.”

“You know I already have.” Using his arm as support, Snowman suddenly pulled Slick closer, her lips covering his as her hand ran into his hair. To everyone’s surprise, Slick didn’t shove her away, instead clasping her waist in an embrace that seemed almost-

“Affectionate?” Droog whispered, suddenly straightening. “Aradia-“

“This is just a tactic, right, Dad? This was part of the plan?”

Instead of a reply, he placed a hand over her eyes, wincing in distaste as the strange couple drew out their kiss for another few moments. Amongst the general air of disgust in the room, a figure stepped forward to yank Slick away, relieving everyone of the sight.

“You were to kill her, Spades Slick, not kiss the woman!” A pale man of about average height shook Slick by the collar, expression stern. “And you, Snowman, how could you betray us for-for him?”

Snowman got to her feet again, wiping her lips on the back of her hand. “There are things you wouldn’t understand, Scratch, that you couldn’t understand.”

“You know him too?” Slick squirmed like a small child in the older man’s grasp, pulling at his collar.

“We had an arrangement.”

“Wait, wait-too?” Droog finally stepped forward, releasing Aradia to examine Slick. “Who is this man, Spades, and how do you know him?”

“He’s just a-an old friend, that’s all!”

“No need to be modest, Spades, tell them all about me.” Scratch shook him gently, smiling. “Hadn’t any of you wondered where Spades ordered his stock for that little store of his? Or how on earth he ever discovered that brat? You all know he’s not smart enough to do it on his own, so I…helped.”

“There’s no proof! You could be Joe Schmo, we shouldn’t believe him!” Deuce stepped forward this time, letting Sollux assist him.

“Is that so?” Scratch nodded to the short man, flexing his hand before pulling something from thin air. Twisted and bent, a horse hitcher appeared in his hand, the despondent equine expression staring at Deuce.

“But that’s-that’s the horse hitcher, the one Hearts got for you-and look, Spades, he’s ruined it, what did you let him do?” Deuce’s voice rose uncomfortably as he stared at the metal, beginning to shake. “What did you do, Spades?”

“You sold us out.” Droog murmured, tone darkly ominous. “You goddamn bastard, you sold us out for this man’s delusions-“

“Ah, ah, ah, not you, my friend. Oh, no.” Scratch shook his head, glancing to Snowman. “Your children.”

“What?” Almost everyone in the room reared back in surprise, the voice from the corner surprising them. Stepping forward, Karkat pulled Terezi along with him, holding her hand gently as he faced the three adults.

“It’s true. Each child has been given a unique gift-an entire book, written into their very genome.” Snowman stared at the ground, avoiding Terezi’s glance. “This man is a doctor, a very prominent one, and he knew of the existence of unused genes within the human genetic code. ‘Waste’ genes, if you will.”

“I was going to change the world-help humanity realize what it had always dreamed of: godhood.”

“However, before his research could go too far, he was arrested on charges of ‘ethical wrong-doing’. Without his notes, he could do nothing, so he copied his writings into a code, a genetic format, and instructed me to place it into as many children as it took.”

“We needed a way to find all of you again once you reached sexual maturity, but of course, Snowman couldn’t adopt six children at once. The timing of Clubs Deuce’s child was merely coincidence-but it gave us an easy target. The four of you tend to make a stir, and Snowman knew how to lure you back. Her aggression gave you a common enemy, and with her two children already in our power, the other three were easy to find.”

“Why not just keep us together, then, or just inject the code once you found willing volunteers?” Sollux questioned, surprising them all.

“Well, I’m glad you asked. You see, on the run it’s very difficult to have access to any proper laboratory equipment or suitable places for raising children, so we knew I couldn’t accept any. And the formula itself only had a shelf-life of about four years, and it would take much longer than that for the police to stop looking for me. This was the best solution.” Scratch smiled at the teen, making him shiver. “Now, if we’re done with all this nonsense, I’ll be going-with the six darlings, of course.”

“No.” Karkat stepped closer, Terezi nodding in agreement. “You’re not.”

“You can’t stop me, boy, your own father sold you out! He knew about this from the beginning-he needed to, in order for us to locate his child.”

“He knew. He knew, and he gave us up for money? For a boy he would only spend fourteen years with? What the hell, Spades?” Droog’s voice had elevated far beyond ‘irritated’ and well into the ‘furious’ range, surprising Aradia. “You were supposed to be our leader, Spades! You were supposed to be our-our friend!”

Slick found himself unable to meet anyone’s eyes, practically sagging in Scratch’s grasp. Karkat turned to Terezi, speaking softly to her, then nodded before moving closer alone.

“Dad?”

“It’s my fault, boy-go on. He’ll kill you otherwise, and you wouldn’t have accomplished much of anything.”

“You knew you would lose me. Why did you do it?”

“I wasn’t thinking-it was lunacy. You were just a baby, I didn’t realize that-“ Looking up, Slick tried to shrug nonchalantly. “That you’d grow up to be just like me.”

“Hell, you raised me, it shouldn’t be that surprising.” Karkat managed a smile, glancing at Snowman. “You and her, huh? Guess it shouldn’t be too strange.”

“Trust me, kid, it was.” Slick grimaced, motioning for him to move back. “C’mon, get going. I don’t want to see you hurt.”

“You won’t.” Karkat stood back slightly, standing tall. “Snowman Scourge, is it true that you sent Terezi to try and…win me over to your stupid cause?”

“Yes. It’s true. And you let her in here, which was good enough for our purposes.”

“So it wasn’t Trace, then…” Aradia mumbled to herself, half-hidden behind her father. “The Felt weren’t even necessary, they were just decoys. We were never in danger.”

“You failed, Mother.” Terezi now stepped forward, taking Karkat’s hand. “You did want me to seduce him, yes, but he in turn seduced me. We fell in love.”

“Pathetic children. You think something like love will be enough to stop me from getting what I want?”

“You’d give up your daughter because of this man’s word?” Karkat posed to Snowman, pulling at Terezi’s hand. “I love her! And you love her, and we both love him! There’s no need to fight against each other, we need to be fighting him!” Pointing to Slick and Scratch respectively, Karkat raised his voice. “You made the deal to hurt the Crew. Dad, you made the deal to hurt Snowman. But we don’t need to fight each other! He’s our enemy here.”

“A passionate plea, boy, but it will do you no good!”

“You think, good doctor?” To Scratch’s surprise, Snowman was now smiling, watching Slick with a finger to her lips. Scratch released Slick to back away in distaste, beckoning to the children.

“Leave these fools you call your fathers! I can make you part of something greater, help you aid humanity for the better!”

“My father is no fool.” Sollux replied, helping Deuce stand straight. “You are.”

“I can bring you down with a single word! I created you, I gave you my legacy, and you would deny it?”

“We would.” Aradia answered, moving to stand beside her father before taking his hand.

“You would stand beside the very man about to sell you for his own gain?”

“I would.” Karkat nodded, finally taking Slick’s hand. “And we won’t ever need you.”

“Freeze, this is the police!” From behind Scratch, two cops burst into the room, guns drawn. “We have evidence that you planned to hold these children hostage, and have led these men into a potentially life threatening trap! Hands where we can see them!”

“You fools.” Scratch scowled at the gathered crew, letting the two men handcuff him. “You’ll pay for this, I swear it-I have masters more powerful than you can imagine, resources better than anything you could-release me, cretins!”

From the corner, a familiar yellow hat was visible, and Itchy slowly edged forward to wave at the Midnight Crew and the others. Snowman acknowledged him with a touch to her hat, beckoning him in.

“Everyone, this is Itchy. I sent him to fetch the authorities once I knew Scratch was coming here.”

“And you-you couldn’t tell us this before?” Slick stared at her, aghast. “You couldn’t warn them, oh, an hour ago?”

“He would have known. He was right about having friends in high places.” Snowman strode forward to look to Terezi, nodding once. “You…you’re being serious about this.”

“Yes, Mother. It’s a bit complicated to explain, but….”

“It would have been inevitable. He does take after his father, doesn’t he.” Snowman smiled faintly, ruffling Karkat’s hair.

“Ah, yes, about that-“ Droog raised a hand, clearing his throat. “Would you mind informing us just what happened between the two of you?”

“We kissed, Droog, grow up.” Despite his words, Slick reddened, hesitating. “We, ah…may had some run ins…”

“He slept with me.” Snowman stated flatly, making Terezi groan. “Granted, that was almost ten years ago, but if he never chose to tell you, then that’s his fault.”

“Ah, yes, about that-“ Droog folded his arms, staring at Slick. “Apparently there’s a lot he hasn’t told us.”

“Listen, can we not deal with this now? I’m bleeding, and I have the feeling we might need to be questioned.” Slick wobbled slightly, Karkat rushing to catch him. “Let’s just get out of here.”

Droog moved to speak again, but Aradia’s hand on his arm made him pause. Eventually, he nodded slowly, sighing. “Yes. Let’s just go home.”


	25. Chapter 25

Slick winced as Aradia adjusted the bandage on his arm, trying to pull away. “Quit it, kid, it’s fine!”

“It’s not fine, it’s a deep wound, and I don’t want Karkat to have to drag you to the hospital.” Aradia nodded firmly, finally leaving the bandage in peace.

“Yeah, well, thanks. Surprising, really, with all this blood-never knew you dames would’ve stood up to it.”

Leaning against the doorframe, Vriska straightened, folding her arms to stare at him. “You’re kidding, right? Do you know what girls have to do more than seven thousand times in their life? Do you know just how many gallons of blood we shed by the time we die? And you think we’d be afraid of it? Hah!”

Slick seemed taken aback, scowling as Snowman appeared to shoo Vriska away. “She’s got a point, Slick.”

“Just-“

“Thank you for at least telling your son the truth.” Suddenly caught in a rather awkward spot, Aradia ducked out to leave them alone. “Diamonds wasn’t altogether pleased.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck about Diamonds. It’s Karkat I’m worried about, and your…Terezi. They seemed pretty cozy the last time I checked on them.”

“What, and you think our relationship will bother them?”

“It’d sure as hell bother me!”

“Relax, Slick, you’ll burst a vein. I already told Terezi that we broke it off years ago. And I don’t mind if she sees Karkat.”

“You could’ve at least told me…” Slick stood, staring at the floor. “I mean, I know it wasn’t anything too formal, but-“

“Then it’s simple. We’re done. Karkat doesn’t like it, but he’ll have to live with it. The past is the past, right? He’s a nice boy, way down deep inside.” Snowman smiled, approaching Slick to kiss a finger before tapping him on the nose. “Not unlike you.”

“Oh, stop it.” Slick shoved her hand away, moving back into the main room to find the rest of their motley crew busy with their own conversations. “It’ll be better this way, I suppose.”

“That it will. And it goes without saying that I won’t be trying to kill you any longer.”

“Finally. Can I count that as my victory?”

“Hell no. I didn’t surrender, I-“

“If the two of you are finished sparring, it would be nice if you sat down.” Their esteemed host, Diamonds Droog himself, watched both of them wearily, nodding as they sat on opposite ends of the coffee table. “Now, I feel there’s little left to discuss, so terms are settled. We’ve finished.”

Snowman nodded, prodding Vriska with her elbow. The girl groaned, but sat up, facing the others. “We’re done with this…whatever it is. We won’t try to kill each other, or outdo each other, or…anything. And I won’t tease Tavros anymore.”

“Well, that was slightly different than what I was expecting, but I’ll take it. As for us, we’ll once again cease hostilities against any members of the Felt, including Snowman, and we’ll…” Droog hesitated, glancing at the company. “Can we keep the weapons on hand, for old time’s sake?”

“Of course. After retrieving my own-“ Snowman eyed Slick in irritation. “I see no reason to hide them away.”

“Excellent. And that is the end of that. I suppose it goes without saying that if you were come to our homes, we’d welcome you in instead of calling the police. It’s only polite.”

“Thank you, Diamonds. An excellent host, as always.”

Slick rolled his eyes, waving them both off. “Whatever, whatever. Meeting dismissed, everyone go home and sleep or something. God knows we need it.”

Droog found himself smiling as Slick, as usual, manhandled the situation to his benefit. He moved to take up his position at the door to bid each guest farewell, letting Aradia move to reset the chairs as their guests left.

Finding Sollux before he could leave, Aradia laid a hand on his arm, clearing her throat to catch his attention. Sollux turned, smiling as he spotted her, then stopped. “Hey, AA.”

“Hey, you.” She ducked forward to touch her lips to his, pulling away with a small smile. “So, um, since you were here, did you want to talk to my dad about…us?”

“Oh. That. Listen, Aradia, I know it’s important, but…it’s been a long few days, yeah? I just got done apologizing to you, I don’t want to have to rehash it with him again. I’m sorry, it’s my bad, I just-“

“No, no, I understand. I get it. Just…we’ll take it slow.” She nodded, letting him pull her into a hug before watching him break for the door. Droog sighed as the last guest finally left, then turned to glance at Aradia with a quirked eyebrow.

“What was that about?”

“Nothing much, Dad, just…one last apology.” Aradia shrugged, smiling as she watched the door. “A way to make things better.”


End file.
